Winterized Puns

Puns For Intelligent People

Icy U

Why is winter the least popular time of year for a wedding?
Because the grooms always get cold feet!
What do you get when someone stares coldly at you?
Glare ice!
I’m trying to break the ice with you, but you keep giving me the cold shoulder.
What did the snow plow guy say when his equipment broke down?
Take this job and shovel it!
What is Spider Snowman’s secret identity?
Peter Parka!
What does Frosty the Snowman do to combat his worries about melting?
Take a chill pill! How does Frosty pay for his chill pills?
With his slush fund!
If snowmen can’t ride bicycles, tricycles, or unicycles, what can they ride?
Icicles!
Snowmen are everywhere in wintertime, but why is it that you never see snow toddlers?
Because they’re always having meltdowns!
Why did the bodybuilder get a tattoo of Frosty on his stomach?
He wanted an abdominal snowman!
If snowflakes were currency, we’d all be rich in winter. We’d just make a trip to the nearest snow bank.
What do you call a whirlwind winter romance?
Love at frost bite!
What kind of soup can you make with cool beans?
Chilly!
Did you hear that they’re performing Hamilton on ice?
Everyone wants the part of Aaron Brr!
How do you defend yourself against zombie snowmen?
With a thawed-off shotgun!
What do you call a $1 ticket to the ice rink?
A cheap skate!
Did you hear about the ski trip?
It started great, but it was all downhill from there!
Why was the snow plow guy famous?
Because he was in snow biz!
I thought we were going sledding, but we went skiing instead. You might say I was mis-sled.