A.I.-Proof Vocations – WIF Jobs

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Jobs That

Artificial Intelligence

Can’t Take Away

Let’s face it. Pretty soon, robots will take over the world, and humanity will become a distant memory. The good news is, by the time technology catches up to The Terminator, we will already be dead.

Artificial Intelligence is invading human territory to take our jobs away, but these robots are going to have a hard time getting everything right. Here are 10 jobs that A.I. can’t take away from humans… at least, not yet.

10. Authors

When you think about it, writing is just rearranging words that already exist. So, A.I. should be able to figure out patterns in language to make their own stories. And, they have! Well, sort of. One Game of Thrones fan and professional programmer named Zack Thoutt was sick and tired of waiting for George R.R. Martin to write his next book, The Winds of Winter. So he decided to create an artificial intelligence software to write it for him.

Just to give you a taste of the results, here is a quote:

“This dragon does not say we had four of a band, or no men or rats and two singers, the great pack of men and the winged trees.”

Maybe that story would make sense after a few glasses of wine, but it’s not likely that a robot will publish a New York Times bestseller any time soon.

9. Fashion Designers and Tailors

Unless you’re a fashion designer, most people in the western world don’t bother learning how to sew clothes anymore. The majority of the clothing in the world is made by people living in Third World countries like Bangladesh, where their working conditions are appalling. However, these people need those jobs to survive. Without the clothing industry, there aren’t enough jobs to replace them, so many of these people would starve to death.

So, who would ever want to risk ruining the lives of millions? Well, there’s Dov Charney. In case you weren’t aware, he founded American Apparel. He was kicked out of his own company because multiple employees came forward with sexual harassment accusations. Charney denies this, but the mattress in his office says otherwise.

He decided to start a new company called Los Angeles Apparel, where he is still employing American seamstresses and tailors. However, his loyalty to his employees seems rather shallow, because he would clearly rather be alone counting his money in a factory with a robot invented by Steve Dickerson called “SoftWEAR”. This robot is learning how to sew clothes. The only snag is, robots don’t have a human sense of touch. They are great at sewing straight lines, but they can?t anticipate when fabric moves or wrinkles. For now, Charney’s plot to ruin even more lives has been foiled.

8. Psychologist

One thing that artificial intelligence is truly terrible at is showing empathy. Since it has never been a human, how can it understand our emotions? Chatbots can?t pass the Turing Test, which means they can’t communicate on the same level of a human conversation.

Alexa and Siri can’t even understand our search requests half the time. Do we really want them to give us advice about our traumatic childhood memories from the third grade? We certainly don?t think so. Besides, therapists need to pay off their crippling student loan debt somehow, and not everyone can be a weirdly successful radio therapist.

7. Doctors

Artificial Intelligence is beginning to break into the medical field. In the future, we’ll be able to get a simple diagnosis by taking a photo on your smartphone. A.I. will run through a database of photographs and compare with yours to see if there’s a match.

There are already programs that exist that can check for skin cancer on that mole you’ve been meaning to get checked out, and another that will look for diabetic eye disease. Heart monitoring watches already have the ability to check for an irregular heartbeat, as well. As time goes on, more and more medical issues can be diagnosed at home.

However, that doesn’t mean A.I. will be taking the place of real doctors. With robots, there is no such thing as bedside manner. Can you really imagine a world where a soulless chunk of metal tells you that you’re dying in six months, with absolutely no empathy? People will always need a human to communicate with about their body, and there needs to be a sense of accountability, in case something goes wrong. After all, if you’re in surgery and things go awry, you need a surgeon who can improvise, not an oversized computer who lacks any semblance of adaptability.

6. Musicians

Artificial Intelligence has been able to create its own music, from Irish folk songs to marimba, and it’s actually quite good. In Japan, a fictional video game android called Hatsune Miku is so popular that she already sells out her own concerts.

But don’t worry. There?s no way A.I. can kill “Lisztomania”‘, which is the phenomenon fans feel towards their favorite musicians. Robots will probably never replace dreamy photos tacked on bedroom walls of little girls everywhere, which means that pop stars are safe, at least for now.

5. Police Officers

You may have seen security guard robots by Knightscope patrolling malls, but their usefulness is questionable, at best. The inventors compare it to a police car parked on the side of the road. If people know they are being watched, they are more likely to behave. Some may see these walking trash cans and believe that Robocop is the next step in technological law enforcement. In reality, humans truly don’t want artificial intelligence in charge of arresting people.

At Shanghai Jiao Tong University, a program was created that uses facial recognition to determine if someone is a criminal or not. They judge features like scars, facial expression, and even the curve of someone’s lip. If you have ever seen Minority Report, you know that this won?t end well. The program has already received a lot of backlash, because obviously, people can?t help if they were just born with a jacked up face.

4. Judges

The European Court of Human Rights gets so many complaints sent to them on a daily basis, it’s not possible to try all of the cases in court. In 2015, the University College London came up with an algorithm that was able to predict a cases’ outcome correctly 79% of the time, which helped them cut down on human work hours sorting through paperwork to find winning cases.

But that doesn’t mean a robot can sit in place of a judge. Human empathy has a lot to do with the outcome of a case. For example, an impoverished mother stealing a loaf of bread would probably be let off with a lesser sentence than someone robbing a bank. Well, unless Javert is on the case, of course. As we just mentioned in the last entry, A.I. also has a nasty habit of being incredibly biased when it comes to facial recognition. Without a 100% accuracy rate, someone would likely end up in jail when they’re actually innocent. Um, y’know, because that never happens with human judges, of course…

3. Art Teachers

Art is an incredibly important part of human history and culture. Even if you were the type of student who fell asleep during art class and wondered why your tuition dollars were being wasted on information you’ll never need to know in your future career, we think we can all agree that we definitely don’t want art education to fall into the hands of a robot.

Thankfully, robotic arms only have the artistic abilities of a 4-year old, and they’re equally as terrible at identifying the artist of a painting. An A.I. program called Recognition searches an image for colors, composition, and facial recognition. The matches they come up with are interesting, but not exactly accurate, like comparing a photograph of corn to a Jackson Pollock painting.

2. Pro Athletes

The 2018 Winter Olympics featured the world’s first skiing robot competition. Does this spell out doom for human athletes everywhere? Not so much. The owners of these mini robots had to chase down their creations as they crashed through flags and fell over on their way down an incredibly small hill. Which is hilarious, but not really a threat to Mikaela Shiffrin’s career just yet.

Considering how expensive it is to build a robot in the first place, it’s safe to say that developers won’t want to create a million-dollar machine just to push it down the side of a mountain. This means that in the future, robots will leave all the broken bones and sports injuries to us humans.

1. Clergy

Last, and certainly not least: the job that is guaranteed to never be taken by a robot is a member of clergy. Robots only function with evidence based on data and facts, and these soulless buckets of metal have absolutely no concept of faith. In fact, a study conducted by The Future of Employment claims that there is less than a one percent chance that clergymen would lose their jobs to robots in the future.

Compare that to telemarketers, who have a 99% chance of being replaced by automated voice messaging systems, and… well, what do you know? Maybe there is a God after all.


A.I.-Proof  Vocations –

WIF Jobs

Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 162

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Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 162

…Edie Dombroski, just like most people who know both women, has no clue about any unconventional history linking Fanny and Constance…

Unconventional Love

Edie Dombroski, just like most people who know both women, has no clue about any unconventional history linking the pair. Her brain doesn’t go down that road. And who could blame her for the oversight, having spent a month with handsome Ace around and now come to find out that Miss Fanny has a beau that comes 1000 miles to see her in the hospital.

It is funny how undue attention from a man has an affect on a girl. When they are one, a wealthy and successful lawyer or two, a dashing and adventurous pilot, it is no wonder that women in the prime of their lives are taken by the notion, despite twenty-some years under the same roof.

“Worth is a dear friend and colleague of mine, we have, how shall I say, came up with creative solutions to complicated situations.”

“I can tell you Mrs. Dombroski that this woman has more determination than I have ever seen. I mean to tell you, that she has single-handedly dismantled an unethical doctor and a conniving banker in the span of 30 short days.”

“You don’t need to tell me,” Edie adds anecdotally. “Has she told you how she landed us in this hospital… have you ever been to the stock car races?”

“Yes we have them in the South.”

“Well up here at the Santa Fe Park they have a night when these men bring their beat-up jalopies and bang into each other until there is only one car able to move.”Related image

“I do believe they call that a Demolition Derby.”

“That is correct, you know your cars,” Edie confirms. “Well one night Eddie, my husband, he’s in the room next door, takes one of his retired cabs and wouldn’t you know it, he won the $100 dollar prize.”

“And this has what to do with Fanny?”

“She had just come over to the house to pick me up to go to the hospital, having driven 1000 miles, by herself, I might add, to visit my shot-up, pneumonia stricken husband. We weren’t there two minutes when a car comes screaming down our isle heading straight for these three people. —

—“So what does Fanny do but throw her car into reverse, and we get t-boned. That’s how we got here, all bruised up. But that’s not the best part…..tell him Fanny…. Tell him who you saved!”

She blushes modestly while answering, “Connie, Ace Bannion and some preacher named Billy Graham.”

“You can tell quite a story Mrs. Dombroski.”


Constance Caraway P.I.

santa_fe_speedway

Forever Mastadon


page 139

 

Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 144

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Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 144

 …Some men must think that we women are stupid, I’ll tell you… barefoot and pregnant that’s the way they want to keep us…

“C-A-S-H is the acronym. That is not funny!” The doctor is 62 years old, but Fanny does not suspect that senility has set in. Rather, she knows what it’s like to have blind faith; trusting, innocent and the opposite of wary. “I think we should find out who rents that post office box.”

“That won’t be easy Miss Fanny, the US Post Office is a government agency and they don’t give out (or collect) personal information,” Attorney Moore would know.

Not

“Fine, then we can do it the old fashioned way. What day is it today?” she asks.

“The 27th,” the doctor responds.

“Is this a leap year?”

The consensus is no,

“So mail your payment on Feb. 28th and I will be waiting to see who picks up their mail at box 13 on the 1st of March, or the 2nd or 3rd, however long it takes.”

Most men must think that we women are stupid, I’ll tell you… barefoot and pregnant that’s the way they want to keep us.” Mrs. Ambrose’s scathing assessment on the rights of women is partly personal and yet not so far out of line. Women have only been voting for three decades, but many a 1951 husband will tell her how to vote because he “said so”.

“I treat my wife like a queen,” Doctor Campbell tells the truth about his home life. “She has a cook, a gardener, a housekeeper…”

“Mr. Ambrose has all those too and she’s called ME! If you get me my money Mr. Moore, I will reward you and Fanny handsomely and then hire me some help!” Mrs. Ambrose is lament-ful.

“We are working for you in the name of justice.”

“God bless you two, you make a good team.”

They are indeed; people come to Worth with their troubles and for the last two of his cases, Fanny has come through with flying Fanny-001colors. He is fond of her, but in more than a professional way. She may be all business right now, a tough nut to crack, but given enough time he believes she could come around. After all, he has inherited all of James Ferrell’s former clients and his reputation is beyond reproach and isn’t hard on the eyes. Perhaps with Constance away, far away… maybe, just maybe he can have a chance with her?


Constance Caraway P.I.

Forever Mastadon


page 125

Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 111

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Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 111

…“That gives us the weekend to bum around this Toddlin’ Town…

“That gives us the weekend to bum around this Toddlin’ Town.”

“Yes, I want to meet all the players in this game. This ain’t your ordinary cheating husband crap,” Ace speculates. Constance Knows.

In the time it takes to drive down Lake Shore Drive south, give or take 10 minutes, she has time to unravel the twisted tale of a missing scientist, two nosey broads from Florida, a relentless storytelling taxi driver and Satan.

“The University of Chicago is an amazing place. It is as diverse a college campus as you’ll find; nothing like the lily-white schools in the south. Willard Libby is a researcher slash professor here and the only reason we came up to the great white north,” when she and Fanny landed in Illinois their lives began to change. “He is an amazing story, was catatonic when we found him, but when you meet him, you wouldn’t know it.”

Libby Dead or Alive-001“So you have him stashed away somewhere?”

“Yeah, they had a funeral for him last week… yes I know it’s bizarre, but the man wouldn’t last a day on the street. Every brother and his mother have been trying to keep his mouth shut, permanent-like.”

“All this because he was shaving a few years off the age of Earth?”

“More than a just a few years and it turns out there is an unbelievable conspiracy to shut him up.”

“Ah ha,” he can appreciate a good put-on, “the bad guys think they have done just that?”

“Isn’t that beautiful?” she gloats. “But the hits just keep on coming—good, smart people are still at risk and there is no letting our guard down.” Ace can tell how serious she really is. “And good folks, like Eddie Dombroski’s family and our neighbor Betty are being kidnapped, Battles_grandeshot or bombed. This needs to stop.”

“Good, let’s stop the bastards, I’m in favor of that, but the last time I checked God could have stopped the devil, before he got going, but he didn’t and WE, little ol’ us is going to do it?”

“According to our Agent Daniels, the double agent’s double agent, a genuine real in-your-face act of God took care of one bad guy. That only ties the score in my book and I want to be on the winning side.” She cups his chin with her freehand, “Sometimes you pick the fight, other times the fight picks you.”


Constance Caraway P.I.

Pick Your Battles

Forever Mastadon


page 98

Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 103

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Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 103

…The funeral ruse, albeit necessary, is a cruel charade  especially for the hundreds of folks that have come to Chicago to pay their respects for Willard Libby…

Libby Funeral

So sad is his grieving Aunt Sister Mary Joseph Franks that she volunteers Tolentine as the location of his memorial service. She and Martin Kamen are the lone attendees that have the real skinny on Libby’s “passing” and his true fate. The ruse, albeit necessary, is a cruel charade  especially for the hundreds of folks that have come to Chicago to pay their respects, but in the grand scheme of things, they have no other choice.

  • Enrico Fermi: “He was a great scientific visionary and a brave supporter of the “nuclear age”…”
  • Billy Graham: “Willard Libby took the time to fully consider all aspects of his research, even those of God…”
  • Bernard Spencer (Daniels): “Pope Pius the Twelve extends his Holy blessing to a wholly innocent soul…”
  • Robert Maynard Hutchins: “As President of the University of Chicago, I express our profound sadness with the passing of a treasured educator…”
  • Walter Zinn (Director Argonne): “When the danger of nuclear research became critical, Willard Libby was the rock of the “Metallurgical Lab”…”
  • Vice-president Alben Barley: “President Truman mourns the loss of such a young, up and coming asset to the United States of America…”
  • Martin Kamen (crocodile tears): “He is my closest colleague and dearest friend. I will never look through my microscope the same way again…”
  • Mary Joseph (not tears – holy water): “I will miss my weekly tea with Will. He would talk about things, of which I had no clue, but we are family and I will see you soon in the Great Beyond…”

Sister Mary had pointed skyward implying a heavenly reunion… but she knows better.

Martin Kamen cleverly uses the present tense when referring to his friend… not a coincidence.

Libby Funeral-001

Pentateuch (has yet to shed a tear – ever): “He was a foolish man who dared to challenge the “Great Deception”…”

Pentateuch claims victory… but he is jumping the gun and is losing focus.

…The ruse, albeit necessary, has become a daily charade…


Constance Caraway P.I.

Daily Charade – Soren Grau

Forever Mastadon


page 93

Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 69

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Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 69

…Constance’s tolerance level for Eddie’s tales is shrinking…

Ear-Ringing

“Eddie!”

Constance calls out mockingly, with their newest jaunt back out to Elgin in mind. Of course he cannot hear, but his ears must be ringing in anticipation of when and where he will be going.

Having returned to the city in daylight last time will make this trip less contentious, though he hasn’t lost his flare for humor, “I charge extra for more people, plus if he needs a wheel chair… you must think I’m a handicap transport?”

“Would you like to join the ranks of the disabled Eddie?” Fanny has a knack for keeping him in line.

Eddie's Cousins-001“Easy Fan,” here he goes, “I’ll have you know that my Cousin Johnnie’s boy has polio and when he has go to Cook County Hospital for his treatments, good ol’ Eddie and his Checker are ‘Johnny on the spot’! That trunk can hold two wheelchairs, patients and all. I remember one day, I think it was January too, the snowdrifts were higher than the roof of my garage and my nephew went into some spaz-attack……….”

“Eddie!”

Constance’s tolerance level for Eddie’s tales is shrinking.

And so they go, on to retrieve Willard Libby from his own personal hell, never mind that the mental health professionals working with him were well-intentioned.

When the Forever Mastadon confederation hatched their scheme of snatch and dump, they counted on Libby being declared hopeless, helpless, any-the-less locked in a padded room for the rest of his days.

They did not want his blood on their hands, so his life was to be spared; not an act of compassion, rather a result of their leader’s eternal guilt. Eternal guilt is akin to eternal regret, the fate that awaits those who do not subscribe to the lordship of that carpenter’s son from Judah (Jesus)

Constance Caraway P.I.

Forever Mastadon


page 65

Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 65

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Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 65

…Would you like to come over and talk about life for a while?…

“I’ll have the chocolate cake, thank you,” Constance had not planned on topping off her meal with a treat, but what the hell.

Fanny returns from the kitchen with an impressive pile of chocolate heaven x3, on a plate and places it in front of her, while removing the apron that had been protecting her white tuxedo blouse from Yancy’s version of Veal Florentine and Flounder Alfredo (Chops and Fish), “Here you go, enjoy. I can take your tab.”

Handing her a twenty, the overtly curious customer asks, “Are you done for the afternoon?”

“Yeah, it has been a long day.”

“I cannot possibly finish this by myself, would you like to share?” In a world of filled with possibilities, this woman’s brain seldom rests.

“Sure,” she responds instinctively, “I’ll get your change.”

Upon returning with one ten, one five and a nickel, Fanny sits opposite Constance and picks up a spoon. “I’ve always loved this stuff.”

Constance is impressed with how casually friendly this gal is. The ease at which she carries on a conversation is so refreshing; it’s like they’ve known each other for years and it goes on for longer than it takes for the chocolate creation to collapse into the recesses of her satisfied gut.

“Here are your tips Miss Renwick, were you going to leave them for me?” Yancy is politely trying to free up a primo table for the Friday dinner hour.

“Will you look at the time, thank you sir?” She pockets wads of mostly singles and gads of quarters and gets up to head for the door.

Constance thinks on the fly, quickly as not to lose contact with Fanny, at least not so abruptly. “I have an apartment over east of State Street (Tallahassee) would you like to come over and talk about life for a while?


Constance Caraway P.I.

Forever Mastadon


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