THE RETURN TRIP – Episode 269

Leave a comment

THE RETURN TRIP – Episode 269

…on Earth we have something called a courtship period…

Leave a tender moment alone. Deke passively offers his hand, waiting for her to seal the deal.

Graphic details aside, Cerella coaches her would-be mate into achieving an unconventional union. One may say it is mutually satisfying. She must have thought long and hard on the mechanics of it all, but if effort is the gauge, she gets an A+.

planetary orgasm

“Orgasmic Physics”

Words are scarce, hardly needed, though she did leave out one minute little small tiny detail, #You are now my mate for life#

Suddenly, talk turns to telepathy and he passes this off as emotional overreaction, until the next thing crosses his mind.

#When our offspring is born, I would like to break with Eridanian tradition and cohabitate, of course only after a public ceremony heralding that the heiress to the High Counsel has taken a mate#

orgasm

“Unconventional Conception”

#How do you know that you have conceived a child?# Expressing thoughts this way comes hard for Deke, who manages to project, #And do I have a say in the matter?#

#I believed you to have feelings for me#

#I do, but on Earth we have something called a courtship period#

#Were you not paying attention Deke McKinney? The Eridanian female mates once and for all time and our law offers no dissolution clause. The child forming in me is your approval of this coupling#

#To death do us part?#

#Death is irrelevant. Are you pleased?#

Thoughts to himself are not, ‘..but I wanted a big family’.

Lies from Mother – bbel.com

#I can conceive but once, I am sorry#

#It is going to take some time for this all to sink in#, he does kiss her tenderly as not to confuse the issue, #and this will be a big surprise to my mother#

#I do not think so, Deke. Before you arrived on Eridanus, Celeste McKinney told me that we would be perfect mates# Her honesty is refreshing, her intent quite clear. —


THE RETURN TRIP

Episode 269


page 238

THE RETURN TRIP – Episode 196

Leave a comment

THE RETURN TRIP – Episode 196

…“Deke McKinney,” she is sure to identify the concerned parties, “take your hands off me!”…

It’s a Trap by Bedard

“Thank you Deke, you make everything happen just like that.” This was her opening to move in closer, for a comfy viewing angle and an excusable snuggle. He does not see any harm in this move, in fact he prefers Susannah’s proximity for a movie showing to Gus, who doesn’t have great smelling hair… or great smelling anything.

About an hour into the movie, a nomadic vampire decides he will hunt Bella for sport and at their first confrontation, Susannah is startled and lets-loose shrieks of horror, acting like she is being attacked; she takes it way over the top and provokes Deke into trying to cajole her.

“Deke McKinney,” she is sure to identify the concerned parties, “take your hands off my bra!” She exposes more than the straps of her Victoria Secret push-up for him to see. She syncs her actions to what’s happening on the 60” screen, with Edward Cullen exposing Bella’s neck for a midnight munch.

Deke thinks she is merely acting out, like when there out riding horses and she takes off and hides in the bushes.

At the point of Twilight when Bella is seriously wounded by James and Edward kills James, she unleashes a bloodcurdling scream, while exposing the breast closest to Deke, who is starting to get freaked.

“Settle down Susannah, whoah, let me help you with your shirt.”

“Take your hands off of me; I’m not ready for sex!”

“Don’t be afraid, I won’t hurt you!”

“That’s what you said the last time,” she tells him as she reaches for her phone (to hang up on the surreptitious call), pretending to check the time after the movie ends. “Can you take me back to my hotel now Deke? Thank you for the great time.”

The poor stiff stands there still baffled by what he had just witnessed. She has always been a bit off-the-wall, but this act was borderline bizarre.

“Sure, no problem, I will give you some shorts and a highly collectible King Ranch t-shirt. Don’t forget you’re dress and shoes.” Even in the face of a fickle female, Deke McKinney’s good character is on display.


THE RETURN TRIP

Episode 196


page 182

THE RETURN TRIP – Episode 195

Leave a comment

THE RETURN TRIP – Episode 195

…In the back of her tainted mind, lurk the words of her father telling her to set the scene for a mock sexual assault…

But, as the other girls are swallowing her stories whole, wishing that that young space cadet across the room were with them, Dashing Deker is probably telling his own tales of romance and upcoming conquest to his buddies.

“She’s a little on the immature side,” Deke relates to his friends, “kind of spoiled maybe, I don’t know. But she is fun to hang out with and you have to love those boobs!”

It’s a good thing nobody in the girl-gaggle can read lips.

The rest of the night falls more into the lines of expectation, when nearing the end of the night some serious posturing is taking place on the dance floor. The frenzied techno-muzic is reduced to belly rubbing ballads; where pelvis-grinding is an art form and tonsil-hockey the standard form of communication.

Deke McKinney’s hormones are not completely dormant, though his thoughts are about the approaching ranch where Braden King has set out the hors d’oeuvres and programmed the gaming system.

Susannah Grisbaum is not entirely pleased with the nonfictional version of her evening with Deke, or the pace at which her fantasies are coming true… or not. Her fib-flaunting talk among the girls is not exactly a replacement for the “real thing”; like a Coca Cola without the carbonation.

She is about to add some hot fizz.

“I’m going to get out of this dress.” She helps herself to the bathroom and slips on an oversize, off-the-shoulder t-shirt.

In the back of her tainted mind, lurk the words of her father telling her to set the scene for a mock sexual assault. It won’t be so hard to make it sound like Deke is trying to take advantage of her underage assets. So while he touts the deli tray, she dials her father’s voicemail and the speakerphone is set to “deceptive”.

“Can we sit on the couch and watch a movie, like an on-demand dusty like Les Miserables or Twilight; yeah Twilight and you can be my Edward.” She refers to the teen movie classic.

“I like Bella, sure we can do the vampire thing,” he pounds the remote keys with the skill of a video master. “Here we go. I cannot remember the last time I saw the original.”


THE RETURN TRIP

Episode 195


page 181

THE RETURN TRIP – Episode 194

Leave a comment

 THE RETURN TRIP – Episode 194

…“SO what kind of kisser is Deke McKinney, Susannah? Is he as dreamy as he looks?” is a representative sample of the girl talk…

Award-winning Illustrator Alexei Vella

“SO what kind of kisser is Deke McKinney, Susannah? Is he as dreamy as he looks?” is a representative sample of the girl talk.

In reality, Miss Grisbaum possesses a puny portfolio of Deke-isms. Their dates are fun beyond explanation, but the devil is in the details. By every definition, the elder McKinney is a straight shooter, even to the point of, do I dare say, boring? If you were his sister, instead of an aspiring debutante, his idea of fun would be… unpretentious hearty fun.

Oh Susannah, if she so chose to, would accurately relate these intimate facts about her Space Academy 18th Annual “Rising Star Dance” date:

  • He’s a great hand holder
  • He is Sonic Burger’s best customer
  • He drives jet cycles fast (so she can grasp his 25” waist tightly)
  • He rides his horse at a full gallop (so she can hang on to him for dear life)
  • He’s the best cheek pecker this side of the Mississippi

Oh what, Oh Susannah actually says is:

  • “We spend hours and hours looking out at the stars, sometimes waking up the next morning in each other’s’ arms.”
  • “And his kisses nearly drive me to insanity, long and really wet.” (she wishes)
  • “He once told me that he would like us to be like his mom & dad…. partners forever.”

“You are so lucky Suzy!”

“And he is taking me back to his house on the King Ranch after the dance,” that much is true. “His stepdad is running for President, can you believe it?” True again. “They are out of town and I think he wants to have his way with me!” Only if he wants to be grounded for a light-year.

But, as the other girls are swallowing her stories whole, wishing that that young space cadet across the room were with them, Dashing Deker is probably telling his own tales of romance and upcoming conquest to his buddies.


THE RETURN TRIP

Episode 194


page 181

THE RETURN TRIP – Episode 192

Leave a comment

THE RETURN TRIP – Episode 192

…“Well it seems sweet Miss Susannah Grisbaum is a senior at Carlsbad High, but what she has failed to disclose is that she is 15 going on trouble.”…

After Roy’s policy speech, with that state of Utopia pending, can reality be far behind…? Francine attempts to vet Deke’s date to the Rising Star Dance.

Utopia

“What do you know about Deke’s date?”

“She’s pretty,” which pretty much sums up Braden King’s in-depth analysis, “Susannah is her name.”

“Does she have a last name BK?” Francine has been left to do the dirt-digging work.

“I believe it is Greasebomb or some odd name like that, a senior at some high school in New Mexico… you know that state just west of here?”

“Do you know the name of the junior Congressman from New Mexico?”

“That isn’t fair, I’m not sure I know OUR Congressman if I met him on the street.”

“It’s not Greasebomb, but you’re close; Hector Grisbaum, a Dem from Carlsbad.”

“Beautiful country out there, have done some quail hunting out at Antelope Ridge.”

“Well it seems sweet Miss Susannah Grisbaum is a senior at Carlsbad High, but what she has failed to disclose is that she is 15 going on trouble.” It seems she skipped 2 grade levels.

“Wow, she is well developed for…”

“Braden!”

“Say, didn’t they invent the Grease Bomb at Alamogordo New Mexico?”

“Braden…..please focus! I want you to insist that they come back to our house after the dance and keep Gus out of their hair.”

“Don’t you trust Deke?”

“Deke I trust, Susannah not so much. Congressman Grisbaum is President Sanchez’ biggest ally on Capitol Hill and he is stumping with Freelove as we speak.” Francine is assuming the worst. “And make sure all the security cameras are working, inside and out.”

“Why not just tell Deke he can’t date Susannah, it’s not like he doesn’t have half the girls in the country mooning over him?” BK dates himself nearly every time he speaks.

“Mooning?” She shakes her head. “How is it you are still single?”


THE RETURN TRIP

Episode 192


page 181

THE RETURN TRIP – Episode 190

Leave a comment

THE RETURN TRIP – Episode 190

…“This country just isn’t ready for a henpecked president…

“Braden tells me that Deke has been dating a girl and he has asked her to “Rising Star”. What on earth is that?” It is Francine‘s job to at least have some clue about the boys’ social life.

“Good for Deke! I was wondering when a girl would turn his head!” Roy beams.

“So he takes a girl to a planetarium to watch the stars? Wouldn’t his convertible be better for that?”

Space Academy“No, no, silly, it’s the big fall event at the Space Academy. I remember taking Becky Bartman… she was a cute filly from Plano… oh wait, I get it.. Rising Star is a dance Francine.”

“Does Deke even know how to dance? And Braden needs to be in town that week, because who knows where in Florida we will be.” Francine knows what’s what with campaign logistics. “Has this girl been vetted?”

“She’s a date, not a democrat!”

“How do you know she’s not?”

“Teenagers are not political creatures and Sammy Mac raised his boys right. I trust he’ll be a perfect gentleman.”

“Will she be a perfect lady? Have you met her family?”

“It sounds like he just met her, give it some time. If the girl interferes with his Academy work, I’ll step in.”

“Okay, you’re the president of our family, but I’m appointing myself vice-president of girlfriends, since you didn’t have the guts to make me the real Veep.”

“The country just wasn’t ready for a henpecked president; Hispanic, Black, Female, Democrat, Democrat, Democrat, did I say Democrat ???? , but not henpecked by the #2. I’ll have my hands full with the one I got.”

“Fine, I didn’t want Char’s job anyway, so I will settle for nosy First Lady.”

“There you go, knock yourself out!


THE RETURN TRIP

Episode 190


page 179

Alpha Omega M.D. – Episode #34

Leave a comment

Alpha Omega M.D. – Episode #34

…”Nessie” is close enough to deliver a staggering jab to his bicep. He will bruise tomorrow, but acts nonchalant for now…

nessie

Loch Ness

“Constitutional law is my true passion,” states young James Ferrell to Abigail’s father.

This is lofty talk for a boy-to-be-man whose short term objectives include stealing a peak down the front of Abigail’s dress for a look at her nubile breasts and to pretend that his punch came from the children’s bowl.

Fortunately for the young couple, Smythwick has his head turned by adult matters of greater yield to him. James grabs Abigail’s hand, rushing her to the Tallahassee “end” of the cavernous room, where talk of Constitutional Amendments pertain to human rights, not the preferential rights of the few.    

Their flight to privacy is halted by John Ferrell, snagging James like a conductor on a train snags the dangling mailbag as it speeds past a whistle-stop.

“Hold up, son, aren’t you going to introduce your pretty friend to your mother and me? Let me get her attention. Martha?!” John motions urgently to his spouse, who is doing her best to entertain those unable to do so on his or her own. At first she is wary, but only until she spots James’ companion. Agnes is attached to her hip, though slightly apprehensive at the prospect of standing next to the nauseatingly slender girl, one year her senior.

“Father, Mother, Agnes, this is Abigail. Abigail, this is my Father John, my mother Martha and my sister Agnes, but we call her Nessie!” She hates being compared to the mythical monster from the British Isles.

Nessie is close enough to deliver a staggering jab to his bicep. He will bruise tomorrow, but acts nonchalant for now.

“I prefer Agnes!”

“I am so pleased to meet you Mr. and Mrs. Ferrell.” She extends her gloved hand which is received and kissed by John, who knows of younger women. “Agnes and I meet at Maclay Park most every year. As a matter of fact, she was kind enough to introduce me to James this very year.”

“You must come to the house Abigail, perhaps before the summer completely passes us by,” suggests the Mrs.

“I would love to, Mrs. Ferrell and please, please call me Abbey. James and all my close friends do.” She is perky, pretty and polite. “My only regret is that our farms are so distant.”

Hillside Estates

Hillside Estates

The miles between Hillside Estates and Fort Sumter South could be and would be closer if the plantation homestead were placed to the southeast corner of the 5000 acres instead of the northwest.

“Do not worry your pretty little head, Abbey, we will find a way. We have a motorcar you know.”

“I would meet you in town. Daddy does not believe in those “metal coffins”, says they will be the end of civilization.”

“I see…,” What can one say that archaic notion..

John Ferrell just rolls his eyes, knowing the old man’s eccentricities go much deeper than that. He remains mute.


Alpha Omega M.D.

Episode #34


page 32

Alpha Omega M.D. – Episode #33

Leave a comment

Alpha Omega M.D. – Episode #33

… Women cannot be presidents, my dear, too temperamental. ” proclaims old Jefferson. “Chairwomen, I would say, but not president…

Capitol Building Tallahassee Florida

The long awaited and much anticipated Summer Cotillion, as presented by the Tallahassee Junior Women’s Club (Mrs. John Ferrell president and committee chairman) has finally arrived. Members and guests are filing into the Grand Ballroom of the State Capitol Building, hungry for a holiday, seeing that Independence Day is more of a Northern thing. Independence has escaped many of those south of the Mason-Dixon Line, a way of preserving a lifestyle that flies in the face of those who comprise the majority in the Union.

If you find yourself not attending this function, you are bedridden, diseased, or socially invisible. Politicians are there to press the flesh. City fathers snuggle up to the politicians. Women are there to be seen. Men are there to see as much as they can. Debutantes aspire to social heights, while their male counterparts are like kids in a candy shop.

All in all, it is a great excuse to dress up and rub elbows with folks infrequently seen in this primarily horse and buggy paced world.

Those attracting the most attention, in this buffet of mostly beautiful people, are the Midway and Quincy contingents.

It may seem unlikely, but shy James Ferrell will be the icebreaker between the two diverse communities. He is also the moth to Abigail Smythwick’s flame. As soon as she and her father make their entrance, young James lights on the budding belle, even though he had never met her father, a churlish figure whose gray long-tailed jacket reeks of Confederate indolence, sans medals and rank markings.

“Father, I would like to introduce, James Ferrell. His mother is the president of the Tallahassee Women’s Club. They are putting on this grand event.” She boasts of a potential beau’s credence.

“Women cannot be presidents, my dear, too temperamental,” proclaims old Jefferson. “Chairwomen, I would say, but not president.”

James fails to object, rather extending his hand, “It is an honor to meet you, sir.”

The clenching of hands nearly buckles the younger’s knees.

“My daughter speaks so highly of you, being of good stock, with healthy Scottish roots. Anglo-Saxon people are the backbone of the globe.”

“I did not tell you he was Scottish, Daddy.” She is ignored.

“She tells me you are interested in law.”

“Yessir.” James is still massaging feeling into his right hand fingers. “Constitutional law is my true passion.”

“Laws are intended to protect the weak. The United States Constitution does the same. Perhaps you will be able to correct these unfair advantages in the course of your endeavors.”


Alpha Omega M.D.

Episode #33


page 31

Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 67

Leave a comment

Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 67

 …The Cadillac Palace Theatre is hosting the (previous Broadway) New York musical version of Gentlemen Prefer Blondes

Fast forward from 1931 and the heart of the Great Depression to 1951 and an America heavily entrenched as policeman of the world. Having just solved Europe’s problems, the US is involved in yet another war, this time in Korea of all places. In contrast to a worldwide financial collapse, the Korean conflict affects mostly the armed services of three countries and their families. The roots causes… well you see… it is fought over — well nobody seems to know why.

But as a war that began in June can be easily set aside in January, so can the CCPI girls shelve a battle that has raged behind the scenes for centuries: Creation vs. Evolution; and that will be tabled for one more day.

The Cadillac Palace Theatre is hosting the (previous Broadway) New York musical version of Gentlemen Prefer Blondes this holiday season and Eddie Dombroski’s cousin Jimmy knows the box office manager, scoring two ducats, as he puts it. The New Years Eve show, with Carol Channing as Lorelei Lee, is a super hot ticket and becomes Eddie’s Christmas present for the girls…

… He gives culturally neutered Martin Kamen 2 tickets to the movies, The Father of the Bride. Early odds are being set at 5-2 that he takes piano coach William with him. “Liz Taylor will get you going Marty!” he hates being called Marty.

The girls are wowed by the off-Broadway performance, “Carol Channing sure is pretty close up,” Fanny is especially impressed with the production adding, “They don’t have anything like this in down home!”

After the show, it is back to the hotel where a seven course meal awaits, followed by a night of dancing to the Jimmy Dorsey Orchestra, featuring the singing of Helen O’Connell. No one seemed to notice that Constance and Fanny did their own thing, partially due to the fact that the eligible bachelor pool was weak and that other than the slow songs, each of them were better dancers together than apart.

But the evening is taking its toll on the pair, barely able to make the champagne toast at midnight, let alone the last dance. Sometimes fun must be trapped and capped, for the memory bank in times to come; overtaken by more recent recollections, like how potentially dangerous their job is becoming.

“I do not want to lose you Fanny; without you the world stops making sense.”

“I’m not going anywhere Connie; you know that I’ll always be there for you.”

Best friends forever.


Constance Caraway P.I.

Forever Mastadon


page 64

Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 66

Leave a comment

Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 66

…“That’s it… sure? Do you ever say no?”

“I do plenty, just not today.”…

“I have an apartment over east of State St., would you like to come over and talk about life for a while?”

— ‘Talk about life – what kind of cornball invite is that? Constance thinks, instead of speaks, to herself this time.

Without so much as a twitch, Fanny Renwick responds, “Sure.”

Was that too easy? again, she thinks to her nosey self. “It’s within walking distance. Let’s leave before your boss kicks us out.”

On the walk to Constance’s modest garden apartment and continuing past the midnight hour, they gain a familiarity usually reserved for life-long friends. Seemingly all of their combined 50 years are covered in that span of 7 brief hours.

Everyone remembers talking forever to someone you have known forever, but in this case, two lonesome spirits bond in a blink of an eye. It becomes apparent that neither wants this day to end, but there are far too many delicate topics that need to be broached before overnight stays are proper.

Before surrendering to separation, Constance tosses another softball in Fanny’s direction, “My parents have a cottage down in Panama City Beach, would you like to come down and hang out this weekend?”

 “Sure.”

“That’s it… sure? Do you ever say no?”

“I do plenty, just not today.”

“You are a peach, Fanny! I thought I was doomed to another boring weekender with the folks. Cool. Pack an overnighter and do not forget your bathing suit.” She may not live with her parents, but they still subsidize their only daughter’s university lifestyle and they truly are boring people, according to their dearest “Connie”. “Where do I pick you up?”

“I’ll meet you back here at your place.” At 25, Fanny is embarrassed to tell Constance that she still actually lives at home with her parents in Frenchtown, an increasingly seedy area in the heart of Tallahassee. “What time?”

“Is 7:00 too early, it’s a two hour drive to the coast?”

“It’s a date, 7 o’clock and don’t be late!”


Constance Caraway P.I.

Forever Mastadon


page 63