Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 193

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Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 193

…There is a song that is crying to get out, so sing along or just hum about…

Karaoke-001

For the night of March 12th 1951 and into most of the next day, Pentateuch is reveling in the wickedness done by his bidding. It does an evil heart good to see the suffering that he has extended throughout the newly evangelized faithful, though most damage is superficial; lives made miserable merely because they came to hear what they are told is the way, the truth and the light.

Now, after the night of mayhem, these inspired hopefuls are left wondering if or when the other shoe will drop.

Penty’s true victories are few and transient in nature; just when he thinks he has triumphed over good, some sort of redemption enters the person’s life to spoil it. There is a “ringer” involved in any particular lifetime equation and it is related to salvation. The only chance that the enemy of salvation can win is if a person hears the Word and renounces it and even then a soul can be delivered, right up and until they are taken from this life.

In the meantime, it is ya-ha time for the Dark Deceptor, who is determined to counteract all that Graham nonsense, especially any of anything to do with that deception-busting Libby; that devious on-worlder that pretends to be dead, to the point of faking a funeral for crying out loud.

Penty almost always loses contact with a departing soul that reaches the Great Beyond (in good standing) with the Divine One, so how was he to know that Willard and his sidekick Martin was were still alive?

Agent Daniels/Jesse James/Cephus is another story. He cannot put his finger-out just how and why he can’t put his finger on him.

There is a song that is crying to get out, so sing along or just hum about:

‘Has anybody here seen my old friend Willard? Can you tell me where he’s gone? He’s freeing a lot of people, but it seems the good die young, you know, I just looked around and he is gone…

‘Has anybody here seen my old friend Martin? Can you tell me where he’s gone? He’s freeing a lot of people, but it seems the good die young, you know, I just looked around and he is gone…

‘Has anybody here seen my old friend Jesse? Can you tell me where he’s gone? He’s freeing a lot of people, but it seems the good die young, you know, I just looked around and he is gone…

‘Anybody here seen my old friend Cephus?

Can you tell me where he’s gone?

I thought I saw him walkin’ up over the hill

With Willard, Martin, and Jesse…’ 

All Rights Reserved ®: Dion and the Belmont’s ™.


Constance Caraway P.I.

Abraham Martin John

Forever Mastadon


page 163

Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 184

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Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 184

…The hard working people of the Midwest will be spared a case of the dreaded Dianetics, which should not be confused with Diuretics…

The Chicago Stadium holds over 21,000 people, for events like these that do not require a wooden court, skating ice, or rodeo dirt. Political conventions and circuses also take advantage of its cavernous interior. Truman was not nominated there, but Democrat F.D.R. was. Economically ill-timed Herbert Hoover and ‘don’t count your chickens before they hatch’ Thomas Dewey were Republican conventioneers. And rumor has it that idyllic Roy Rodgers lassoed to Dale Evans into matrimony, wowing the crowd with his six-shooter… how can a girl resist?

And isn’t it a crying shame, that the very run of Billy Graham Crusades takes the dates once promised to the departed Langston Richard Cannon and his Spiritual Engineering gaggle. The hard working people of the Midwest will be spared a case of the dreaded Dianetics, which should not be confused with Diuretics, though they have similar results in different parts of the body, 2 feet apart.

One thing for sure, the many thousands seeking charismatic attention will not be causing much of a ruckus on their own. Neither would the weather on Saturday March 10th, with a warm front pushing the thermometer near 60 degrees, though the penalty paid comes in the form of a foggy drizzle. But signs of an early spring are a gift from God, having paid the price of a usually harsh upper Midwest winter.

The stage is set for another attempt at causing revival. Actual revivals are normally born of prohibitionist personalities, because it is easier to guilt a person into becoming a believer, if you can point out their debauched behavior. Graham, however, has found more upbeat ways to bring his audience closer to their God, like convincing a life-long scientist to profess his belief that, in his field of expertise, he readily accepts the parameters of a divine Creation over the speculation of random Evolution.

Alongside Willard Libby will be a 500 person choir, a full orchestra (both recruit locally) Youth for Christ International speaker Charles Templeton and popular baritone George Beverly Shea.

Footnote: More than a few of the people attending each evening mention President Truman’s radio address touting Billy Graham as the reason they came out.


Constance Caraway P.I.

Forever Mastadon


page 156

A.I.-Proof Vocations – WIF Jobs

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Jobs That

Artificial Intelligence

Can’t Take Away

Let’s face it. Pretty soon, robots will take over the world, and humanity will become a distant memory. The good news is, by the time technology catches up to The Terminator, we will already be dead.

Artificial Intelligence is invading human territory to take our jobs away, but these robots are going to have a hard time getting everything right. Here are 10 jobs that A.I. can’t take away from humans… at least, not yet.

10. Authors

When you think about it, writing is just rearranging words that already exist. So, A.I. should be able to figure out patterns in language to make their own stories. And, they have! Well, sort of. One Game of Thrones fan and professional programmer named Zack Thoutt was sick and tired of waiting for George R.R. Martin to write his next book, The Winds of Winter. So he decided to create an artificial intelligence software to write it for him.

Just to give you a taste of the results, here is a quote:

“This dragon does not say we had four of a band, or no men or rats and two singers, the great pack of men and the winged trees.”

Maybe that story would make sense after a few glasses of wine, but it’s not likely that a robot will publish a New York Times bestseller any time soon.

9. Fashion Designers and Tailors

Unless you’re a fashion designer, most people in the western world don’t bother learning how to sew clothes anymore. The majority of the clothing in the world is made by people living in Third World countries like Bangladesh, where their working conditions are appalling. However, these people need those jobs to survive. Without the clothing industry, there aren’t enough jobs to replace them, so many of these people would starve to death.

So, who would ever want to risk ruining the lives of millions? Well, there’s Dov Charney. In case you weren’t aware, he founded American Apparel. He was kicked out of his own company because multiple employees came forward with sexual harassment accusations. Charney denies this, but the mattress in his office says otherwise.

He decided to start a new company called Los Angeles Apparel, where he is still employing American seamstresses and tailors. However, his loyalty to his employees seems rather shallow, because he would clearly rather be alone counting his money in a factory with a robot invented by Steve Dickerson called “SoftWEAR”. This robot is learning how to sew clothes. The only snag is, robots don’t have a human sense of touch. They are great at sewing straight lines, but they can?t anticipate when fabric moves or wrinkles. For now, Charney’s plot to ruin even more lives has been foiled.

8. Psychologist

One thing that artificial intelligence is truly terrible at is showing empathy. Since it has never been a human, how can it understand our emotions? Chatbots can?t pass the Turing Test, which means they can’t communicate on the same level of a human conversation.

Alexa and Siri can’t even understand our search requests half the time. Do we really want them to give us advice about our traumatic childhood memories from the third grade? We certainly don?t think so. Besides, therapists need to pay off their crippling student loan debt somehow, and not everyone can be a weirdly successful radio therapist.

7. Doctors

Artificial Intelligence is beginning to break into the medical field. In the future, we’ll be able to get a simple diagnosis by taking a photo on your smartphone. A.I. will run through a database of photographs and compare with yours to see if there’s a match.

There are already programs that exist that can check for skin cancer on that mole you’ve been meaning to get checked out, and another that will look for diabetic eye disease. Heart monitoring watches already have the ability to check for an irregular heartbeat, as well. As time goes on, more and more medical issues can be diagnosed at home.

However, that doesn’t mean A.I. will be taking the place of real doctors. With robots, there is no such thing as bedside manner. Can you really imagine a world where a soulless chunk of metal tells you that you’re dying in six months, with absolutely no empathy? People will always need a human to communicate with about their body, and there needs to be a sense of accountability, in case something goes wrong. After all, if you’re in surgery and things go awry, you need a surgeon who can improvise, not an oversized computer who lacks any semblance of adaptability.

6. Musicians

Artificial Intelligence has been able to create its own music, from Irish folk songs to marimba, and it’s actually quite good. In Japan, a fictional video game android called Hatsune Miku is so popular that she already sells out her own concerts.

But don’t worry. There?s no way A.I. can kill “Lisztomania”‘, which is the phenomenon fans feel towards their favorite musicians. Robots will probably never replace dreamy photos tacked on bedroom walls of little girls everywhere, which means that pop stars are safe, at least for now.

5. Police Officers

You may have seen security guard robots by Knightscope patrolling malls, but their usefulness is questionable, at best. The inventors compare it to a police car parked on the side of the road. If people know they are being watched, they are more likely to behave. Some may see these walking trash cans and believe that Robocop is the next step in technological law enforcement. In reality, humans truly don’t want artificial intelligence in charge of arresting people.

At Shanghai Jiao Tong University, a program was created that uses facial recognition to determine if someone is a criminal or not. They judge features like scars, facial expression, and even the curve of someone’s lip. If you have ever seen Minority Report, you know that this won?t end well. The program has already received a lot of backlash, because obviously, people can?t help if they were just born with a jacked up face.

4. Judges

The European Court of Human Rights gets so many complaints sent to them on a daily basis, it’s not possible to try all of the cases in court. In 2015, the University College London came up with an algorithm that was able to predict a cases’ outcome correctly 79% of the time, which helped them cut down on human work hours sorting through paperwork to find winning cases.

But that doesn’t mean a robot can sit in place of a judge. Human empathy has a lot to do with the outcome of a case. For example, an impoverished mother stealing a loaf of bread would probably be let off with a lesser sentence than someone robbing a bank. Well, unless Javert is on the case, of course. As we just mentioned in the last entry, A.I. also has a nasty habit of being incredibly biased when it comes to facial recognition. Without a 100% accuracy rate, someone would likely end up in jail when they’re actually innocent. Um, y’know, because that never happens with human judges, of course…

3. Art Teachers

Art is an incredibly important part of human history and culture. Even if you were the type of student who fell asleep during art class and wondered why your tuition dollars were being wasted on information you’ll never need to know in your future career, we think we can all agree that we definitely don’t want art education to fall into the hands of a robot.

Thankfully, robotic arms only have the artistic abilities of a 4-year old, and they’re equally as terrible at identifying the artist of a painting. An A.I. program called Recognition searches an image for colors, composition, and facial recognition. The matches they come up with are interesting, but not exactly accurate, like comparing a photograph of corn to a Jackson Pollock painting.

2. Pro Athletes

The 2018 Winter Olympics featured the world’s first skiing robot competition. Does this spell out doom for human athletes everywhere? Not so much. The owners of these mini robots had to chase down their creations as they crashed through flags and fell over on their way down an incredibly small hill. Which is hilarious, but not really a threat to Mikaela Shiffrin’s career just yet.

Considering how expensive it is to build a robot in the first place, it’s safe to say that developers won’t want to create a million-dollar machine just to push it down the side of a mountain. This means that in the future, robots will leave all the broken bones and sports injuries to us humans.

1. Clergy

Last, and certainly not least: the job that is guaranteed to never be taken by a robot is a member of clergy. Robots only function with evidence based on data and facts, and these soulless buckets of metal have absolutely no concept of faith. In fact, a study conducted by The Future of Employment claims that there is less than a one percent chance that clergymen would lose their jobs to robots in the future.

Compare that to telemarketers, who have a 99% chance of being replaced by automated voice messaging systems, and… well, what do you know? Maybe there is a God after all.


A.I.-Proof  Vocations –

WIF Jobs

Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 86

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Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 86

…Connie suspects there is more than piano tutoring going on between William and the Dean’s daughter…

The Dombroski involvement in this universal affair is part and parcel the result of Eddie’s chance offer of livery; a simple airport fare differs greatly from risky short-term employment. They had provided cover for themselves in renting the Packard sedan for him to drive, but protecting Eddie’s personal interests had not crossed their minds. Eddie will not be of any good service until his wife is found.

“Do not touch anything Eddie, we’ll be over soon… 45 minutes,” she dons panty, bra, slacks and blouse while concluding the call, asking Fanny, “Is William with Martin?”

“No, I saw him trying the bathroom door knob while you were in the shower.”

“How about Martin and Willard…?”

“They have been staying at Will’s office ever since he snapped out of his coma,” Fanny serves as the crew’s social secretary, sees all & knows all of everyone’s everything.

“Good,” Connie runs back down the hallway to the common bath, barging in without knocking. “Get the car William!”

With nary a towel to cover him and a beet-red face he reacts, “This better be important Constance, I have a lesson scheduled with the Dean’s daughter.”

“You can tickle her ivories another time sonny,” she has seen the two together and suspects there is more than piano tutoring going on between them, “get dressed and warm up the car, we have a friend to help.”

“Poor William,” Fanny expresses sympathy for a nice young man who is challenged when it comes to romance.

Constance is not the least bit concerned about that. Ramifications are spreading like an allergic rash, with benign redness leading to serious discomfort. And for all his foibles, Eddie has been nothing but loyal to them despite the uneven cadence of his employ. Never once was his wife to be part of the deal. Innocent coalitions have lead to collateral damage.


Constance Caraway P.I.

Forever Mastadon


page 78

The NULL Solution = Episode 126

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The NULL Solution = Episode 126

…like an unlucky coin, you and your people turn up around most of the turmoil in this galaxy…

The Ÿ€Ð haven’t ruffled any feathers so far,” Sampson observes.

“If you mean being overly aggressive, they have not. Sure, they may have conscripted a few folks, but not a shot has been fired.” Skaldic ponders some more. “They have lost their home world, a fleet of ships and much of their identity. They may be looking for someone to blame.”

“Are you looking at me or Deke? We’ve been a couple of choirboys lately!”

“Choirboys?”

“Hey, you Eridanus guys are the music-majors in this man’s army. A choir on Earth is comprised of the very best singers… at a house of worship… church… which means they are always on their best behavior.”

“Your galactic reputation does not match that description. You are a stowaway gang from a planet that nearly destroyed itself and you seem to be bent on procreating & colonizing wherever the spacewinds blow.” So much for that fan club thing.

“That is harsh Skaldy. I thought you were my friend.”

“I am, but like an unlucky coin, you and your people turn up around most of the turmoil in this galaxy.”

“I can appreciate the “bad penny” reference, but if it weren’t for bad luck, we wouldn’t have any at all. 1st our space station blows up, stranding us. We find a ship to survive on, only to be hauled all the way out here, without our permission. Sure the McKinneys have made a couple babies along the way,” Sam looks Deke’s way, “but we also helped out a few new friends here and there. Spread some new technology around. Can you think of any harm in all that?”

“Your planet was close enough to smell the debris from those Ÿ€Ð cruisers. All I am proposing is to contact them before Eridanus can be blamed.”

“I would be honored to accept the position of Ambassador to the Axis.”

“We want to prevent conflict, not start it. Ekcello and Cerella are contemplating hyperphysical contact without delay.”

You needn’t hit old Sam McKinney over the head with a hammer. —


***please note that the BAD PENNY BLUES predated certain songs by the Beatles i.e. Lady Madonna


The NULL Solution =

Episode 126


page 125

The NULL Solution = Episode 83

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The NULL Solution = Episode 83

…that was 20 years ago, was it not? I am surprised you have your sanity…

From David Sipress NYTimes

“My friends call me Locutus,” Picard surprises everyone with his quick retort.

It is hard to catch an astronaut off balance.

“He’s messing with you Gussy. Good one Picard, I like your style!” And Roy means it. “Speaking of stranger than fiction, are Deke’s princess and her “child” in any danger by remaining on Earth?”

“No. It appears that water, oxygen and such are mutual environmental requirements, though I think Cerella is used to substantially more oxygen. That’s why it is fortuitous that you happen to have a hyperbaric chamber out here in the middle of nowhere.”

Image result for time to change the subject

“I bet we could hop over to Mars, right damn now, and set up shop Crip!”

“You are just itching to out there and check it out, I can tell.”

“Well we are flying blind if we don’t. We need answers. We should provide answers before some amateur astronomer with a powerful enough telescope spots what’s Image result for keeping balls in the air gifgoing on and starts some video that goes viral.”

“We are keeping far too many balls in the air, son; some distant civilization is coming to get us – no one has noticed that Deke isn’t on the damned planet – And that’s just for starters.”

“Is that Joyner’s father?” Inquiring minds need to know.

“Yep Doc. And until Cerella plopped into your lap, we weren’t sure what happened to him… we didn’t even know where the hell Sampson and Celeste McKinney went.”

“The parents, ah yes, I remember now, but that was 20 years ago, was it not? I am surprised you have your sanity.”

“I may not after all, if I agree to let Gus take SEx out to Mars. For as many questions that you have helped us answer, there are as many or more we haven’t a clue about… like what’s behind the Martian reboot or that enigma wrapped in a riddle & shrouded in mystery that we have named Lorgan.”

“Lorgan… what and Essex, huh?”


The NULL Solution =

Episode 83


page83

The NULL Solution = Episode 73

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The NULL Solution = Episode 73

…Philanderers philander and physicians spring into action, in this case J-LP pulls a double shift…

“Any Visitors?” asks Dr. Picard of his receptionist.

“Non,” The response of “no” is the same in any {most} languages.

Once inside his Institute’s fourth floor sanctuary, he checks a few patient charts, while elevating his leg, which is sporting a cast that does not have space for another Sharpie signature.

By the time 7 O’clock rolls around, he has had enough of business, or so he thought. Before he can leave the room, out of nowhere, a very foreign-looking woman appears behind him. She is apparently in some distress.

“How did she get in?”

She is dressed like she comes from another planet and sounds like a harp when she speaks. Other than that she looks like she needs medical attention, specifically an OBGYN.

Dr. Picard takes her hand and has her stand inside a full-body scanner, an absolute necessity for any 21st Century medical office. Obviously she is with child, the child is in distress, but her anatomy does not match any he has seen before. There is no recognizing this from that, other than a very large child whose umbilical cord reaches the up to the base of her regally poised skull.

“What on Earth? If we deliver that baby and cut the cord, there may be serious damage to both of you.” Philanderers philander and physicians spring into action, in this case J-LP pulls a double shift. He calls down to the surgical suites to accommodate this unsolicited patient. “I need the most experienced nurses available… and I need a gurney on the 4th floor, STAT.”

Cerella, Heir to the High Council of Eridanus, has been deposited to the single solitary person on Earth…, nay, in the galaxy, who is qualified to deliver her & Deke’s child, not-to-mention the near-impossible task of preserving the cognitive functions of both mother & child.

10 light years away, the father waits and worries.–


The NULL Solution =

Episode 73


page 75