Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 175

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Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 175

…After a stop at THE newest cop-spot in town, hands their partially pulverized passenger his wallet, with most of his money in it…

“We was only susposed to rough him up good, Neal,” is the fleeing mugger’s lament.

The other cop in pursuit, who looks like he spends half of his shift at the donut shop, gives up the chase, in order to catch his breath and pick up the loose items. Some of the money magically disappears into his pocket.

He walks unsteadily back to his partner, who has summoned a paddy wagon for the offender in hand and an ambulance for hospital transport; but the medics merely serve as a mobile emergency room, attending to a few scratches and a bruised ego. “Can you guys give me a lift to 6137 Kimbark,” is all Worth Moore asks of the police.

After a stop at THE newest cop-spot in town, Dunkin’ Donuts, the officer with the bigger sack of baked confection, hands their partially pulverized passenger his wallet, with most of his money in it, plus, “I don’t know if this means anything toFM Biz-001 you.”

“Forever Mastadon, 5046 South Greenwood… so much for a random attack,” Worth realizes that because of his association with CCPI, he is now a prime target for revenge action. He hands the card back, “This was no accident. When you question the thug you did catch, try to get to the bottom of this so-called business.”

“5046 is off limits to us… now,” stated like a good soldier.Greenwood-001

“What do you mean off limits? There is awfully suspicious activity coming from that house and you are telling me that you cannot complete an investigation?”

“After an incident a week or so back, we must have pissed someone off, because all of a sudden it is on our blacklist and that comes right from the top. Hey I was there and it was plain freaky.”Libby Affair-001

Moore has first hand information of what went down that day, so traveling further down that road is unnecessary, but a top-down directive usually means some sort of cover up. Suffice it to be said, that the scope of this Libby Affair is without definable limits.


Constance Caraway P.I.

donuts

Forever Mastadon


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A.I.-Proof Vocations – WIF Jobs

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Jobs That

Artificial Intelligence

Can’t Take Away

Let’s face it. Pretty soon, robots will take over the world, and humanity will become a distant memory. The good news is, by the time technology catches up to The Terminator, we will already be dead.

Artificial Intelligence is invading human territory to take our jobs away, but these robots are going to have a hard time getting everything right. Here are 10 jobs that A.I. can’t take away from humans… at least, not yet.

10. Authors

When you think about it, writing is just rearranging words that already exist. So, A.I. should be able to figure out patterns in language to make their own stories. And, they have! Well, sort of. One Game of Thrones fan and professional programmer named Zack Thoutt was sick and tired of waiting for George R.R. Martin to write his next book, The Winds of Winter. So he decided to create an artificial intelligence software to write it for him.

Just to give you a taste of the results, here is a quote:

“This dragon does not say we had four of a band, or no men or rats and two singers, the great pack of men and the winged trees.”

Maybe that story would make sense after a few glasses of wine, but it’s not likely that a robot will publish a New York Times bestseller any time soon.

9. Fashion Designers and Tailors

Unless you’re a fashion designer, most people in the western world don’t bother learning how to sew clothes anymore. The majority of the clothing in the world is made by people living in Third World countries like Bangladesh, where their working conditions are appalling. However, these people need those jobs to survive. Without the clothing industry, there aren’t enough jobs to replace them, so many of these people would starve to death.

So, who would ever want to risk ruining the lives of millions? Well, there’s Dov Charney. In case you weren’t aware, he founded American Apparel. He was kicked out of his own company because multiple employees came forward with sexual harassment accusations. Charney denies this, but the mattress in his office says otherwise.

He decided to start a new company called Los Angeles Apparel, where he is still employing American seamstresses and tailors. However, his loyalty to his employees seems rather shallow, because he would clearly rather be alone counting his money in a factory with a robot invented by Steve Dickerson called “SoftWEAR”. This robot is learning how to sew clothes. The only snag is, robots don’t have a human sense of touch. They are great at sewing straight lines, but they can?t anticipate when fabric moves or wrinkles. For now, Charney’s plot to ruin even more lives has been foiled.

8. Psychologist

One thing that artificial intelligence is truly terrible at is showing empathy. Since it has never been a human, how can it understand our emotions? Chatbots can?t pass the Turing Test, which means they can’t communicate on the same level of a human conversation.

Alexa and Siri can’t even understand our search requests half the time. Do we really want them to give us advice about our traumatic childhood memories from the third grade? We certainly don?t think so. Besides, therapists need to pay off their crippling student loan debt somehow, and not everyone can be a weirdly successful radio therapist.

7. Doctors

Artificial Intelligence is beginning to break into the medical field. In the future, we’ll be able to get a simple diagnosis by taking a photo on your smartphone. A.I. will run through a database of photographs and compare with yours to see if there’s a match.

There are already programs that exist that can check for skin cancer on that mole you’ve been meaning to get checked out, and another that will look for diabetic eye disease. Heart monitoring watches already have the ability to check for an irregular heartbeat, as well. As time goes on, more and more medical issues can be diagnosed at home.

However, that doesn’t mean A.I. will be taking the place of real doctors. With robots, there is no such thing as bedside manner. Can you really imagine a world where a soulless chunk of metal tells you that you’re dying in six months, with absolutely no empathy? People will always need a human to communicate with about their body, and there needs to be a sense of accountability, in case something goes wrong. After all, if you’re in surgery and things go awry, you need a surgeon who can improvise, not an oversized computer who lacks any semblance of adaptability.

6. Musicians

Artificial Intelligence has been able to create its own music, from Irish folk songs to marimba, and it’s actually quite good. In Japan, a fictional video game android called Hatsune Miku is so popular that she already sells out her own concerts.

But don’t worry. There?s no way A.I. can kill “Lisztomania”‘, which is the phenomenon fans feel towards their favorite musicians. Robots will probably never replace dreamy photos tacked on bedroom walls of little girls everywhere, which means that pop stars are safe, at least for now.

5. Police Officers

You may have seen security guard robots by Knightscope patrolling malls, but their usefulness is questionable, at best. The inventors compare it to a police car parked on the side of the road. If people know they are being watched, they are more likely to behave. Some may see these walking trash cans and believe that Robocop is the next step in technological law enforcement. In reality, humans truly don’t want artificial intelligence in charge of arresting people.

At Shanghai Jiao Tong University, a program was created that uses facial recognition to determine if someone is a criminal or not. They judge features like scars, facial expression, and even the curve of someone’s lip. If you have ever seen Minority Report, you know that this won?t end well. The program has already received a lot of backlash, because obviously, people can?t help if they were just born with a jacked up face.

4. Judges

The European Court of Human Rights gets so many complaints sent to them on a daily basis, it’s not possible to try all of the cases in court. In 2015, the University College London came up with an algorithm that was able to predict a cases’ outcome correctly 79% of the time, which helped them cut down on human work hours sorting through paperwork to find winning cases.

But that doesn’t mean a robot can sit in place of a judge. Human empathy has a lot to do with the outcome of a case. For example, an impoverished mother stealing a loaf of bread would probably be let off with a lesser sentence than someone robbing a bank. Well, unless Javert is on the case, of course. As we just mentioned in the last entry, A.I. also has a nasty habit of being incredibly biased when it comes to facial recognition. Without a 100% accuracy rate, someone would likely end up in jail when they’re actually innocent. Um, y’know, because that never happens with human judges, of course…

3. Art Teachers

Art is an incredibly important part of human history and culture. Even if you were the type of student who fell asleep during art class and wondered why your tuition dollars were being wasted on information you’ll never need to know in your future career, we think we can all agree that we definitely don’t want art education to fall into the hands of a robot.

Thankfully, robotic arms only have the artistic abilities of a 4-year old, and they’re equally as terrible at identifying the artist of a painting. An A.I. program called Recognition searches an image for colors, composition, and facial recognition. The matches they come up with are interesting, but not exactly accurate, like comparing a photograph of corn to a Jackson Pollock painting.

2. Pro Athletes

The 2018 Winter Olympics featured the world’s first skiing robot competition. Does this spell out doom for human athletes everywhere? Not so much. The owners of these mini robots had to chase down their creations as they crashed through flags and fell over on their way down an incredibly small hill. Which is hilarious, but not really a threat to Mikaela Shiffrin’s career just yet.

Considering how expensive it is to build a robot in the first place, it’s safe to say that developers won’t want to create a million-dollar machine just to push it down the side of a mountain. This means that in the future, robots will leave all the broken bones and sports injuries to us humans.

1. Clergy

Last, and certainly not least: the job that is guaranteed to never be taken by a robot is a member of clergy. Robots only function with evidence based on data and facts, and these soulless buckets of metal have absolutely no concept of faith. In fact, a study conducted by The Future of Employment claims that there is less than a one percent chance that clergymen would lose their jobs to robots in the future.

Compare that to telemarketers, who have a 99% chance of being replaced by automated voice messaging systems, and… well, what do you know? Maybe there is a God after all.


A.I.-Proof  Vocations –

WIF Jobs

Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 167

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Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 167

…most of the neighborhood probably thinks someone is setting off fireworks…

Greenwood-001 MeanwhileAs part of the lead grouping on this unlikely assault on a neighborhood residence, P.I. Constance and G-Man Jesse are outfitted with all the protective gear, like that afforded to the men who stormed the beach at Normandy, on that fateful day a mere seven years ago. Though National Guard presence is nominal, it is an indicator of how serious The Libby Affair had become.

Falling in the line behind, deuces are wild on this pre-dawn March morning; 2 x 2 are 20 Chicago police cruisers each with two men inside, too-jacked-up on thick black coffee in anticipation of some bigtime action. Some of the old-timers liken this raid to the Prohibition runs in the days of Dillinger & Capone.

You might think that mobilizing 2 shifts of an entire police force would be enough, but  R-6 Sikorsky military helicopters are hovering over Lake Michigan, due east of the 5000 block of south Greenwood just in case. No one, including the master planners, knows what will exactly go down.

Over the police frequency Daniels gives the marching orders, “After we shoot the concussion shells into each floor, I want all vehicles to focus their spotlights at every square inch of that house — from the north and  the south and the street and especially the alley.”

The nondestructive bomb, intended to stun everything inside rockets through the side entrance, the second floor bathroom window and a third floor bedroom, unleashing a series of prodigious thumps, with but small puffs of smoke. Other than being lit up Image result for fireworks giflike a Christmas tree, most of the neighborhood probably thinks someone is setting off fireworks

… But certainly not anyone inside this building under siege.

All lighting is trained on the house, 360 degrees and forever, but nothing happens immediately. The hibernating bats don’t like it and scatter into the dawning day, as do any ghostly apparitions from the house’s scary past.

Constance Caraway P.I.

To read what happens next at 5046 Greenwood…

Forever Mastadon

page 142

Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 165

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Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 165

…If we can handle political conventions and all those crazies, I think we can handle one house…

“What can you tell us about the organization called Forever Mastadon?” asks the higher ranked flatfoot, the very first law enforcement hereabout to ever/even admit to wondering what has been going for months in the greater Chicagoland area.

Constance steps into the interrogation, FM is the group behind the abduction of Willard Libby, a scientist affiliated with the U of C. not to mention all the other crap they have pulled on anyone connected to the poor man. They have an agenda, one where he keeps his research to himself.”

“Do you have an address for these people; somewhere we can put a stop to this?”

Greenwood 5046

5046 South Greenwood

“Yeah, 5046 South Greenwood, that would be a good place to start, at this point Constance would not mind having a 2,000 man police force pitch in on this battle, “but if you go there, I’d make sure you have enough men. You will not believe what you’re up against — we do, though being able to explain it to you in advance is hard. You should form your own opinions.”

“Say, aren’t you the broad who shot those two guys on the North side? It was the talk of the department.”

That was me, yes. I took out the two guys who kidnapped Fanny two months ago, then Edie a month back,” her mea culpa comes without remorse. “Don’t you sense a trend going on here? Two rooms of this hospital hold repeat victims of these creeps.”

“Would you be willing to lead a team of tactical officers on a sweep of that Greenwood address?”

“Would I? Hell, I am ready to put another hurt on that bastard.”

“Another? You talk like you have a history with their leader.”

“Yeah, you could say he’s one hell of a handful. If you would let me, I’d like to bring in Agent Daniels-001an expert, he’s with the CIA. He possesses a particular set of unique skills, been on this case longer than me and Fanny.”

“If you can get him here by tomorrow, you have a deal.”

“You can find me at these numbers, telephone and street over on the university campus.” Connie was born to the big time. “One unmarked comes and gets get us before dawn, but I want you to understand one thing… we — Agent Daniels and me are going to be in charge of the operation.”

“I’ll have all the men in our district on the scene, riot gear, gas masks, blast shields, the whole shot. If we can handle political conventions and all those crazies, I think we can handle one house.

Famous last words?


Constance Caraway P.I.

FM Biz-001

Forever Mastadon


page 141

Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 164

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Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 164

…Constance’s spring fling with Ace has set some big picture issues in motion…

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“What kind of cops are you? Did you find a homeless guy to stuff behind the wheel?” Constance is irate and rightfully so.

“I want you to bring the ER doctors in to corroborate Miss Renwick’s story,” Attorney Moore insists.

“Their shift is over.”

Fanny speaks up, “There were two other witnesses, right Connie?”

“There were and we can bring them back if you need, so back off.”

The two harsh detectives mumble to each other and step out into the hall. After some back and forth between Moore, Constance, Fanny and Edie, and the passage of 15 minutes, they go out and check on the cops.

“They’re gone. What the hell is going on?”

On the floor outside room 314 there is a crumpled business card. Worth Moore picks it up. “What kind of enterprise is Forever Mastadon… a wooly mammoth? I never heard such a ridiculous name.”

“If you are going to join in on the fun Worth, have Fanny catch you up on all the dirty details.” Constance can see something is cooking with those two and deep down inside she is alright with it. Her spring fling with Ace has set some big picture issues in motion. “I am going over to the local police district to get the skinny on those phony cops.”

This time it is a nurse popping her head into room 314 to announce, “There are two policemen here to take down your statement Miss Renwick.”Image result for revolving door gif

“What is this, a revolving door? Check their badges Worth,” Constance is losing her patience for the treatment of the patients here.

“They are legit Connie. Go ahead officers.”

In the course of the short interview the police reveal that the car Fanny stopped in its tracks was stolen and the story about no driver, well that one they can’t explain.

“What can you tell us about the organization called Forever Mastadon,” asks the higher ranked flatfoot.


Constance Caraway P.I.

Witnesses

Forever Mastadon


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Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 163

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Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 163

…”This is bloody bullshit. What kind of cops are you?” Constance cuts thru the nonsense…

Seal of Approval-001“You can tell quite a story Mrs. Dombroski.” states the impressed lawyer from the South.

“She learned it from that guy in the other room,” Fanny has consumed dozens (by osmosis) these past 2+ months.

At that point, the attending emergency room physician comes in to gives his two recent patients some news; neither good nor bad, “The CPD is here and they want to interview you two, and then I am going to release you, you can go home.”

“What about Eddie?” inquires Edie. She is worried about the $52 dollars a day they are paying for his hospitalization, “We don’t have insurance.”

“Mr. Graham has taken care of that — what a gem he is. He stopped in and visited all our rooms before he left.” Fanny speaks of a good man, from the soles of his Godly feet to the wavy hair atop his 6 foot frame.

“I can take you all home after you are finished with the police. The two cars I saw out there need to be pried apart,” Lawyer Moore will be looking out for Fanny and Edie’s interest from here on out, so he ushers the plain clothed investigators into 314.

“From what we can see, you pulled out into a lane of traffic and caused the other vehicle to run into you. That is a violation on your part. The driver of the other was killed in the accident thereby making it vehicular homicide. We are going to have to take you in and seeing you are from out of state, we will hold without bond.”

“But there was no driver!” Fanny is beside herself.

Constance has joined the discussion, having come to the hospital to check in on everyone.

“There was no driver, detective. You can ask the emergency room people. They did not find a driver, dead or alive.” Correct, Mr. Moore.

“We found a body behind the wheel and how else would the car get there in the first place?”

“This is bloody bullshit. What kind of cops are you?” Constance cuts through the nonsense.


Constance Caraway P.I.

Forever Mastadon


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Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 24

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Constance Caraway P.I. ~ Episode 24

…“This place is a mess, Martin, how does this guy know where anything is…

Scott Brown Art

Constance – Martin – Fanny

“This whole case is leaving an international aftertaste in my mouth.” Constance is concerned.

“Okay already, I get your point. It’s not like I’m going to plagiarize his work. I will break into his office, without a key or permission and we’ll see what we can find. It’s at the end of the hall.”

One, two, three they hustle down the polished granite floors of the Humanities Building, prepared to find a way to the other side of the door labeled:

“Stand back!” Tailing behind, the slightly built Martin Kamen prepares to bust down the door in a rush.

“Martin, you don’t need to…”

But he does anyway, putting every ounce of his 160 pounds, but the black oaken door swings in to the left without resistance. Kamen finds himself face down on the floor.

“… do that!” giggles Fanny. “Constance picked the lock,”

“Apparently.” He dusts himself off, having bruised his ego, not his body.

“This place is a mess, Martin. How does this guy know where anything is?”

“Willard is a neat freak. I would say that someone has been looking for something. I was here on the 18th and it was as neat as a pin.” Martin had been in here many times, but he had never used a discerning eye when looking about.

“Let me guess, there won’t be any record of who had the opportunity to do this?” Constance surmises that universities are trusting by nature, “That would be too easy.”

“We have an excellent campus police force, I’ll have them come and check this out.”

“What am I, Swiss cheese? I’ll take it from here and I’ll let you know when you can call in those cardboard cutouts for cops.” She is not impressed with any of the security she has seen, whether here or at that supposedly “top secret” national lab out in nowheresville. “Fanny, I see that you are dusting for prints, keep your eyes peeled for any mistakes made by the creeps who did this.”


Constance Caraway P.I.

Forever Mastadon


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