Porter, Pizza, Peanut Butter and Pudding – Oktoberfest Beer Partaking

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Strange Beers That

Challenge the Norm

10. Pizza Beer

pizza beer

How many times have you sat down to eat a pizza, only to think “If only I could drink this”? We reckon the number out there is very small, but just in case you have, the Seefurths have you covered. Known as theMamma Mia Pizza Beer, the couple claim that their invention is the “world’s first culinary beer”, born from the thought of combining a supply of tomatoes, garlic and herbs. The pair then networked with other radical brewers around the world to finalise a recipe that creates pizza beer.

So, how is it made? Pretty simple. Within the mash, a margarita pizza is added. This is allowed to “steep like a tea bag”, according to the official website. A wheat crust made of water, flour and yeast is topped with some familiar ingredients you’d see from your local pizza place; some tomato and oregano, for instance. More spices are added during a boiling process, and the mixture gets bottled up for two weeks.

So does it fit the bill? According to the reviews, the beer does actually taste and smell just like pizza. Its low score, however, is simply because the absolute last thing people want to crack open on a hot summers day is liquefied Italian dishes. Still, a potential novelty purchase for the teenage mutant ninja turtle of the household.

9. Mangalitsa Pig Porter

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Next time you go to throw your dinner scraps away, take a time to think; what would it taste like if all of this were brewed into a beer? Chances are you’ll be more repulsed than inspired, but that didn’t stop Right Brain Brewery from trying their own spin.

The fact that it’s called “pig porter” is its first warning. It’s brewed using the heads and bones of pigs, which are thrown into the mix using cheesecloth bags after being smoked. The beer is then transferred from the bottom into another tank, deliberately avoiding all the fat that rises to the top. Right Brain Brewery would also like to tell you that there’s no need to worry — their latest batch does, in fact, contain the eyeballs along with the rest of the pig head. You know, in case you were concerned that they were missing the good bits.

Just before you file this under “disgusting”, however, perhaps note that the critics who have tried this beer actually state that it’s not that bad. In fact, it’s actually quite good. Drinkers of the porky porter pointed out that the flavor had a smoky hint to it, with the taste of fatty pork coming through at the end. So if you’re looking for something to accompany some roast pork, you can do worse than this pig-beer.

8. The End Of The World

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For some people, brewing beer is a passion. For others, it’s straight-up competition. While everyone else is presumably cramming strange things into their mashes to make strange new beers, there’s an ongoing war to make some of the strongest beers known to man. In the arena of ‘extreme ABV brewing’, breweries from across the world work to create beverages of high alcohol content. One of those breweries is Scotland-based BrewDog.

They entered the arena with their beer, Tactical Nuclear Penguin, which earned a respectable 32% ABV rating. When it was beaten by a German brewery, they had to step up their game with Sink the Bismarck! at 40% ABV. When that lost its title, BrewDog once again put up a fight with an interesting beer called The End of History. At a powerful 55% ABV, The End of History is not a drink to be taken lightly. The first thing you note about a bottle of The End of History isn’t its strength, however; each one was stuffed inside a stuffed animal. And we don’t mean the kind you find at a Build-A-Bear:

“Only 12 bottles have been made and each comes with its own certificate and is presented in a stuffed stoat or grey squirrel,” the website says. “The striking packaging was created by a very talented taxidermist and all the animals used were road kill. This release is a limited run of 11 bottles, 7 stoats and 4 grey squirrels.”

Since then, the war for the highest ABV has run into fierce competition, with some accusations of cheating along the way. As long as nothing is bottled in anything weirder than a stuffed stoat, however, The End of History may be outdone, but it won’t be forgotten.

7. Beer Geek Brunch Weasel

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It may be strange to some people that some beer use coffee as one of their ingredients, but when the coffee itself also uses a strange ingredient in the brewing process, you end up with a beer that requires a brave resolve to try.

The Beer Geek Brunch Weasel from Mikkeller seems innocent. It’s a 10.9% Norwegian beer that’s classed as an Imperial Oatmeal Stout. It contains coffee as one of its ingredients, but not the kind that you can buy in the supermarket – Mikkeller states that the coffee within Beer Geek Brunch Weasel is “one of the world’s most expensive coffees”. So you know you’re getting quality the moment you buy it. That is, if you decide to buy it after you discover the coffee is brewed from cat faeces.

It is, apparently, not a practical joke. After all, we’re not talking aboutany cat, here – the dung comes from “weasel-like civet cats” who are renown for being choosy how they eat. The cats consume only ‘the best and ripest coffee berries’, and their stomach enzymes play a part by breaking the beans down. In short, these cats are doing you a favour, thank you very much. Now drink your cat poo beer. And if you want further proof the world slowly went mad while you weren’t looking, the beer is getting absolute rave reviews, being praised as “world-class” quality. One of the reviews goes into detail about the flavour, stating that it has a “bitter coffee in the backend”, which probably could have been worded better.

6. PB&J Beer

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There’s no dancing around the name of this one. If you want to go back to the days of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, but want an adult twist on it, these stouts might just be right for you. Yes, that’s right – stouts plural. It turns out, PB&J beer isn’t isolated to just one brewery. Making the perfect beverage-based replica of the iconic sandwich is a hobby quite a few breweries have taken up, with creations including Peanut Butter Jelly Time, No Crusts, PB&J Stout and the more simply-named Peanut Butter and Jelly Beer.

The latter beer was brewed at Edmond’s Oast, a company who have experimented with beverages such as chocolate and banana beers. They keep the ingredients as authentic as possible, using grape juice and peanut butter powder to nail the flavour of the sandwich. People who drink it agree; the beer’s flavour comes “exactly as promised”.

Just don’t let the kids catch wind that you have a case.

5. La Jordana del Escorpion en Fuego Hacia la Casa del Chupacabra Muerto

A beer that contains a scorpion as an ingredient would definitely be classed as a little weird, but the Unknown Brewing Co. didn’t stop there. The mix of one of their brews calls for ninety-nine of the nasty creatures to be added to the recipe.

The name (which is the long string of Mexican that makes up the title of the entry) translates out to “The Path of the Fiery Scorpion through the House of the Dead Chupacabra”, which is probably an absolute pain to try to order in the middle of a crowded bar. It’s at a pretty potent 10.1% ABV, and contains agave nectar and serrano peppers alongside the ghastly ingredient mentioned before. The scorpions come into play during the brewing process, thrown in when the beer and the hops are boiled.

It seems the addition of scorpions did not harm the flavour too badly.Reviewers say that the beer is “a decent beer on its own” and “certainly an experience”, just in case you’re looking for a brew with a sting in its tail.

4. Sumerian Beer

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Sometimes, a beer doesn’t need weird ingredients in order to stand out. Sometimes, it depends where the recipe came from.

Such is the case for Great Lakes Brewing, who tried to create a Sumerian beer. The ingredients weren’t the curious part about this brew; what was interesting was how scholars from the University of Chicago were eager to help create it. After all, when you’re trying to brew a beer that dates back four millennia, you’re going to need the help of friends.

Before people could write, the Sumerians were tinkering with beer. When they did get around to inventing the written word after all those pints, they describe some of the beers they created as “a golden beer, a dark beer, a reddish beer, a dark and sweet beer and a filtered beer”. Unfortunately, the exact recipes of each of those beers are lost to history, but the brewers were encouraged to experiment with the ingredients the ancient Sumerians had on-hand to reproduce a guess as to what they were drinking – beers made from dates, coriander, fennel and juniper berries.

3. Celest-jewel-ale

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Sometimes you just need some space and some beer, but some people want some space in their beer.

The brewers at Dogfish Head decided to add something a little not-of-this-Earth into their drinks; lunar meteorites. Before you consider their antics a little over the top, there is a little logic in using the space rocks in a beer — their makeup of salts and other minerals allows them to actually aid during the fermentation of the beer, giving the ingredient more use than just a simple novelty.

And if you want a little extra sensation of space with your drink, the Rehoboth Beach brewpub also sold covers to help “protect” your beer. Its material? The same stuff they use to make actual spaceman suits out of. Because when you ask someone to hold you beer, you want to make sure it comes back in one piece.

2. Sticky Toffee Pudding Ale

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At this point, we’ve probably covered enough beers where you could construct a full-course meal with different kinds of beverages. Those with a weaker stomach are probably grateful that there hasn’t been a beer that represents a dessert yet. This entry is for them.

Unfortunately, the actual ingredients that go into Charlie Well’s Sticky Toffee Pudding Ale are kept a secret, but they promise that they use “the finest ingredients” combined with ‘accredited mineral water’ to produce the brew. At a modest 5% ABV, the Pudding Ale is another entry into the brewery’s range of “pudding ales”:

“This is very much a beer first and a dessert second,” says Karl Ottomar, the head brewer. “It is brewed with our trusted pale ale malt and a secret blend of complex sugars. The initial sweetness of Sticky Toffee Pudding Ale is tempered by a gentle bitterness which delivers the sweet taste of caramel and toffee along with a smooth and robust aftertaste.”

Despite the alluring company description, the beer received an overall“okay” score by reviewers. The beer goes a bit overboard with the sweet flavours, creating more of a mess than a tasty beverage, thus proving you can’t have your cake and drink it too.

1. Rocky Mountain Oyster Stout

rmo stout

When you’re creating a stout, you have to get the balance of ingredients just right for an appetising blend. When it comes to an interesting mixture, Rocky Mountain Oyster Stout has all the bases covered.

The 7.5% ABV brew contains some fine flavours in its mix; seven kinds of malts, Styrian Goldings hops, Colorado hops, barley, and twenty-five pounds of bull testicles. You know, the usual suspects. The best part about the beer is that its origin was a joke in itself. A video that the company uploaded for April Fool’s Day back in 2012 was meant to be just that – an April Fool’s joke. But when people began to respond positively to it, the Wynkoop brewery decided – unfortunately – that it had to become a reality. As such, real, actual bottles of Rocky Mountain Oyster Stout were brewed and bottled.

To top it off, the resulting flavour is apparently quite decent, with people complimenting the brews strong, meaty flavour. So, at least the idea isn’t a load of bull, even if the drink is.

Porter, Pizza, PB&J and Pudding

– Oktoberfest Beer Partaking

Refreshing Beer Facts – WIF Summertime 10-pack

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Beer

10 Refreshing Facts About

the World’s Best Beers

To paraphrase famed scholar Homer Simpson, beer is the cause of, and solution to, all of life’s problems. That’s probably why almost every country on Earth has a particular beer its denizens prefer. But each of those market dominating beers holds a secret…

10. China’s Snow Beer:

Popular Despite its Taste

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Snow Beer is the single most popular beer on Earth. If you’ve never heard of it, that’s not surprising considering the beer is pretty much only sold in China, where it accounts for a dominating 84% of all sales despite the fact its parent company spends almost nothing on advertising.

In other words, Snow Beer has been able to secure the coveted title of “most popular beer on Earth” while only being available for sale in a single huge market with little to no advertising. The beer is so seldom shipped abroad that it’s considered foreign in Hong Kong and is notoriously difficult to get a hold of, even in specialty beer shops. But you’re not missing out on anything special, because according to this CNN article quizzing Chinese residents it’s bitter, flat and unappealing. Normally we’d make a quip about the power of advertising, but since Snow doesn’t advertise we’re a little lost for words.

9. America’s Bud Light:

Cynically Appealing to the Buzzfeed Generation

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In recent years, Bud Light has replaced its more calorie heavy, beer gut causing cousin as the favored beer of the United States, thanks in part to a massivepush on behalf of the company that owns the brand, Anheuser-Busch. They’re regarded as industry trendsetters for being one of the few companies to successfully tap the burgeoning millennials market by re-structuring itsmarketing to better appeal to young, hip, twenty-something consumers who are more concerned with tweeting, partying and taking selfies than anything those lame-ass adults care about.

While this has undoubtedly led to some innovative campaigns like the much reported on “up for whatever” campaign, which saw a thousand random young adults being invited to a town called Whatever for a weekend long party, you have to keep in mind these were all masterminded by stuffy guys in suits cynically predicting that millenials would fall for whatever marketing they shoved down their throats as long as it was on Buzzfeed or Tinder. That’s not a joke, those were both platforms they used.

What’s worse is that Bud Light spokesmen have claimed they can reach over 50% of all 21-27 year olds using these methods. Yes, Bud Light is so cynical about the predictability and manipulability of young adults that they think they can make 50% of us pay attention to one of their ads with a post on Buzzfeed. Which is kind of insulting, but also depressingly realistic if the post they’re talking about happens to have GIFs.

8. Mexico’s Corona:

Limes and Wagers

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The most commonly consumed beer in Mexico and Fast and Furious movies is Corona. Unusually for a successful domestic beer, Corona enjoys a good deal of success in several foreign markets, particularly the United States and the United Kingdom. Abroad it’s almost universally consumed with a wedge of lime, something that confuses Mexican people to no end.

Despite it being considered customary to garnish Corona with lime, there’s no agreed upon consensus for why this is the case, since the beer has never been consumed that way in its native Mexico. A popular theory is that the custom was started by a New York barman for a bet in 1981, but this has never been confirmed because of course it hasn’t. Corona themselves have been tight-lipped about discussing what, if anything, the lime is supposed to do. Either they have a secret deal with a Mexican lime farmer, or they don’t check their emails.

7. Singapore’s Tiger:

Time for a Tiger

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Along with being the most popular beer in both Singapore and Malaysia, Tiger is proof that the west really needs to step up its game when it comes to naming alcoholic beverages. When drinks like this and Cobra are on the market, we honestly don’t know how anyone can justify drinking anything less metal.

Since the ’30s Tiger has used the slogan “Time for a Tiger” in a great deal of its advertising, because even soulless ad agency workers can see that’s a slogan people will never get tired of hearing. One person who agreed with this sentiment was Anthony Burgress, who used the slogan as the title for a 1956 novel.

Burgress would later reveal that he chose Tiger’s slogan as the title purely because he wanted a free clock from Tiger. When Burgress asked the company if they’d send him a clock for giving them a bunch of free advertising, they rather reasonably asked if they could see a copy of the novel first. Offended at the idea of a company wanting to see if their intellectual property was being used in a way that didn’t make them look bad, Burgress went back and hastily added a line saying that Tiger Beer sucked and Carlsberg was better. The change prompted Carlsberg to send him a complimentary crate of beer.

Even though Burgress made fun of their product and generally acted like a petulant child in all correspondence with them, when Burgress visited Singapore in the ’70s Tiger tried to bury the hatchet by offering him free beer for the duration of his entire visit. Burgress heroically turned the offer down, because sometimes being a colossal jackass requires a bit of sacrifice.

6. Russia’s Baltika:

Better than Coke

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As we’ve talked about before, in 1860 almost half of the Russian government’s income came from taxes placed on vodka. Russians love them some vodka, and given how much of it they drink you could be forgiven for thinking that beer isn’t a thing over there. Well, until 2013, it kind of wasn’t.

While beer is certainly sold in Russia, with the Baltika brand being the most popular overall, it wasn’t legally considered alcohol until 2013 due to a quirk in Russian law that dictated that any alcoholic drink that had a strength of less than 10% was considered a foodstuff and thus could be sold as a soft drink. Along with speaking volumes about how hardcore Russians are when it comes to drinking, it also means that prior to 2013 you can technically say that the best-selling soft drink in Russia was a beer.

5. Jamaica’s Red Stripe:

Jamaican in Name, American in Spirit

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According to the marketing guys behind Red Stripe, it’s a traditional Jamaican style lager with a rich history. According to Google, Red Stripe was first brewed in Illinois for a century before it was bought out by some British guys during prohibition who then marketed it to soldiers stationed in Jamaica. After proving popular in Jamaica, Red Stripe was then marketed back to the States as an exotic foreign brew from the mysterious sun bleached sands of a tropical island. Thus proving that, with good enough marketing, you can convince people of anything.

Oddly, when Red Stripe was initially pitched to the States, it failed to catch on because they sold it in green bottles instead of the distinctive brown ones they used in Jamaica, marking the only time in history Americans complained that something being brought in from a foreign country wasn’t dark enough. A more hilarious twist came in 1989, when all shipments of Red Stripe were cancelled when it was discovered that cannabis was being smuggled in with each shipment. We honestly wouldn’t be surprised if someone at Red Stripe did that on purpose just to really sell Americans on the idea that Red Stripe was from Jamaica.

4. Brazil’s Skol:

Hobo Murdering Super Beer

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Although Skol is most popular in Brazil, we’d like to talk about its ill-fated foray into the British market, mostly because we get to use the phrase “murder beer.” High alcohol content beers are by no means a new thing, but Skol’s Super Beer (it’s actually called that) was on another level entirely. Unlike other high alcohol beers which are sold as premium prices, Super Beer sold for just a pound per can despite having roughly the same alcoholic content as an entire bottle of wine.

Unsurprisingly, the beer proved to be incredibly popular with the homeless to the point that it’s still a running joke in the UK to call it “tramp juice.” The government was less amused, as they noticed a concerning rise in the number homeless people drinking themselves to death after the beer and others like it became widely available. Before legislation was introduced to make access to the beer more difficult with a tariff, it was estimated that perfectly legal super-strength beers that people could buy for less than a pint of milk were killing more homeless people than crack cocaine or heroin. Perhaps even more worrying is that up until 2013, the same murder beer that was killing homeless people in the UK could have been sold like a can of Coke in Russia.

3. Japan’s Asahi:

The Poo Building

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Since homeless people drinking themselves to death is kind of depressing, let’s lighten the mood by talking about Asahi, Japan’s beer of choice. More specifically, we’d like to tell you about the big building Asahi constructed that looks like it’s topped with enormous golden feces.

Built in 1989 and dubbed “one of Tokyo’s most recognizable modern structures,” the Asahi Beer Hall is supposed to resemble a frothing beer glass. It houses a beer hall where customers can sample its many products. Unfortunately, residents of Tokyo had other ideas and instead decided that the golden monument atop the building more closely resembles feces or a spermthan a frothing beer. Which wouldn’t be that bad if the building wasn’t rightnext to Asahi’s headquarters. That means it’s now common for people in Tokyo to refer to the headquarters of the best selling beer in their entire country as “the poo building.” But hey, it hasn’t hurt sales.

2. North Korea’s Taedonggang:

Better than South Korea

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Taedonggang, which is pronounced however the hell you feel like it, is North Korea’s leading brand of beer and, according to the few outsiders who’ve had the honor of sampling it, isn’t half bad. North Korea’s crippled, outdated infrastructure has actually made it easier for Taedonggang breweries to make top notch beer, because none of the other factories in North Korea produce enough pollution to affect its otherwise pristine water supply.

As you’d expect from a country where you’re not allowed to have the same name as the guy who runs it, the only reason Taedonggang beer exists is because Kim Jong-il wanted to prove a point. Apparently the late leader got into an argument with a South Korean official at a 2000 summit in Pyongyang about the quality of North Korean beer. Incensed at the idea of South Koreans enjoying better beer than his people, he bought an entire brewery from the United Kingdom and had it shipped piece by piece to North Korea, then demanded that it begin producing better beer than South Korea. Kim Jong-il was so keen to promote this new patriotic beer that he even granted special permission for an advertisement to be run on North Korean TV, something that’s only ever been done a handful of times.

And it worked! Not only is Taedonggang the most popular beer in North Korea, the few experts who’ve tried it have admitted that it’s way better than any South Korean beer. We think we’d still prefer to live in the South, though.

1. Ireland’s Guinness:

Nazis and Toucans

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Guinness had genuine plans in place to advertise in Nazi Germany during the 1936 Olympics. You know, the ones held in Germany that Hitler himselfattended. While nothing ever came of it, primarily because a London based subsidiary advised the Irish wing against pandering to Nazis, they did end up reusing one of the designs when they eventually launched in the United States a few years later.

Just to be clear, Guinness took a poster that they had originally planned to hang in bars around Nazi Germany, changed the flag in the background, and then used it announce their glorious arrival in the United States.

Refreshing Beer Facts

– WIF Summertime 10-pack

Beer Helped Shape the World – WIF Concocted History

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10 Ways Beer Shaped

Human Civilization

Hybrid cars, computers, those terrible smartphone games everyone’s hooked on: humanity has come a long way since our cave-dwelling, hunting-and-gathering, Quasimodo-looking forefathers. But why? What drove all of these fantastic exhibitions of human achievement?

Well, some of the biggest accomplishments in the history of mankind came about because of beer, which is ironic since beer is also one of the biggest causes of stupidity. The modern world was shaped by booze, the miracle elixir that gives us that warm, fuzzy feeling, followed by that headache-y, I’m-going-to-die feeling. These accomplishments include:

10. The Great Pyramid of Giza

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Egypt will forever be associated with its famed pyramids, because those gargantuan things are impressive — especially the Great Pyramid of Giza. About 5,000 years ago, soon after Pharaoh Khufu took the throne, he realized that his soul was going to need somewhere to crash for the eternity after his death. All the good pyramids were taken, so he commissioned the building of the 455-foot behemoth, which remained the tallest man-made structure on the planet for almost 4,000 years.

An exorbitant amount of workers, estimated between 20,000 and 30,000, labored in the hot Egyptian sun for about 23 years. Cutting, dragging and placing limestone bricks wasn’t easy work, especially when you’re getting them almost 500 feet up. There had to be some motivating force to inspire workers, who were primarily farmers doing this in their downtime almost every day. That force was an estimated 231,414,717 gallons of beer.

“It was a source of nutrition, refreshment and reward for all the hard work,” said Dr. Patrick McGovern, an anthropology professor at the University of Pennsylvania. “It was beer for pay. You would have had a rebellion on your hands if they’d run out. The pyramids might not have been built if there hadn’t been enough beer.” So without beer, the only remaining Wonder of the Ancient World would not be standing today. History: goes down smooth.

9. Marketing

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Fast-forward to the 1700s and beer is still a driving force behind civilization. The Bass Brewery was founded in 1777, and by the 1890s it was the most prominent beer company in England and the largest in the world, pumping out about 1.5 million barrels of the stuff every year. You can make the world’s most popular beer of the 19th century until the cows come home, but there’s an important element every product needs to resonate with its customers: brand recognition.

That’s, of course, where marketing comes in. Marketing is a constantly evolving business, but it was terribly archaic in the 1870s, so much so that it wasn’t really much of a thing at all. Bass Brewery knew they had a quality product on their hands, and they marketed it successfully enough to make it the most successful beer brand in England, but they needed to think of ways to secure its reputation and grow its brand recognition even more, to appeal to people in every walk of life. In doing so they revolutionized the advertising industry, and it was all in the name of getting people trashed. How did they do it? Well…

8. Logos and Trademarks

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Bass Brewery decided their beer needed a visual identity, some sort of clear and distinct mark indicating which products were theirs. This was especially important since literacy rates were low, so this would allow uneducated folk to recognize a Bass Brewery drink when they saw it. What they did was take a red triangle, write “Bass” under it, and splash that sign all over everything they produced in one of the earliest examples of a logo.

They established brand recognition, but what was to stop other breweries from using Bass Brewery’s logo on their stuff, taking advantage of their reputation to increase their own sales? At the time, nothing, but on the first day of 1876, the British Trade Mark Registration Act went into effect, and the company’s name and logo became the first registered trademark in England. As is evident in the marketing-saturated culture we live in today, advertising and the whole “protecting your intellectual property” thing took off. So you can thank beer for Geico’s “hump day” commercials.

7. Soda

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Around the same time as the founding of Bass Brewery, an inquisitive English chemist named Joseph Priestley was hard at work publishing over 150 works related to science, theology, politics and philosophy. In 1767, he moved next door to a brewery in Leeds. Naturally curious, he paid them a visit and picked their brains about their work. Priestley was fascinated by the gasses coming up from the vats of beer, and got permission from the brewers to perform some experiments.

He realized that by pouring water over the vats, it developed a sweet, fizzy flavor. In 1772, Priestley released a publication titled “Impregnating Water with Fixed Air,” in which he announced his new invention called “soda-water.” Priestley’s discovery of carbonation eventually led to soda and the billions of dollars of revenue that Pepsi, Coca-Cola and the like bring in every year, but his experiments in gas also reinvigorated his interest in studying air…

6. Discovery of Oxygen

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Priestley knew that putting a living organism in a jar and depriving it of air was a death sentence, but he wasn’t sure why. As a (creepy) child, he enjoyed putting spiders in jars and seeing how long they would last before their eyes went dead and their legs stopped wiggling. Continuing his blood-lust fueled experimentation, he put a plant in a jar and waited for it to die. Not only did that not happen, it actually continued to grow.

This excited him, so he continued his work and, several experiments and papers later, Priestley had discovered oxygen gas. We now know it as the third most abundant element in our universe by mass and, along with awareness of the burden our posthumous debt would leave on our families and the constant desire for more beer, one of the key factors that keeps us from dying.

5. Refrigeration and Shipping

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In 1871, German engineer Carl von Linde published a paper on improved refrigeration techniques, which caught the eye of local breweries. The environment required for beer brewing needs to be cold, so production of it had to be put on pause during the warmer months. Beer is a cash cow that breweries would rather not stop milking for any stretch of time, so von Linde’s expertise became highly sought after.

Gabriel Sedlmayr II of the Spaten Brewery asked von Linde to develop a way to keep his brewery cold, so he went ahead and made a refrigerator, which before that point didn’t yet exist on a scale that would be useful for a brewery. It worked fantastically, and brewing beer became a year-round pursuit in areas where this wasn’t previously possible.

The implications of von Linde’s work were broad. Food could be kept cold and preserved without ice, which was useful both in the home and in the shipping industry. Export of food (and really, any product that had to be kept cold) was difficult and oftentimes impossible, so refrigeration opened the floodgates and added a new dimension to long-distance shipping. Refrigeration is also used in air conditioning and a multitude of other fields.

4. Modern Medicine

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Sour milk sucks, as it’s a regrettable waste of a perfect and versatile beverage, but the problem would be so much worse without French chemist and microbiologist Louis Pasteur. He was asked to help a local brewer who wanted to know why his beer was going sour. He took samples from the vats, looked at them under a microscope and found thousands of microorganisms, which he believed were the cause of the putrefaction that was making the beer taste bad.

With this in mind, he invented a process that’s now known as pasteurization, which involved warming the beer to below boiling point to kill off the bacteria that was spoiling batches. Today, this process is used widely in the food industry, most notably in milk and other dairy products.

This also led to him disproving spontaneous generation, confirming that matterdidn’t simply arise out of dust. Using this information as a stepping stone, Pasteur discovered that microorganisms, like those that rendered so much beer worthless, also caused disease in humans. This school of thought is called germ theory, and was the catalyst of modern medicine. Pasteur’s work opened the door to research into the identification of disease-causing germs and life-saving treatments.

3. Agriculture

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Let’s go back to the rumored origin of beer: Some gatherer left a container of raw barley in the rain, which started the germination process. The barley was then dried and used for baking or whatever else people would have used it for, but was then again left out in the rain, where the partially germinated barley was exposed to natural airborne yeasts and an extremely primitive version of beer resulted.

Probably on a dare or lost bet, one of these people took a sip and realized this new liquid not only tasted great, but had the same inebriating effect as his people’s honey and fruit based wines. The ancients loved this stuff, and they needed more, but collecting the grains needed to make it would be a lot simpler if all the barley was in one place. From there, driven by an indefatigable desire for more beer, they planted, cultivated and harvested crops. Agriculture was born.

2. Written Language

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Farming is more than sticking seeds in the ground and hoping something emerges from the dirt: there’s a lot of organization involved. Farmers have to know what’s growing where, how long it’s been there for, when it’s time to harvest and other crucial bits of information related to the growth of barley and brewing of beer. How were you supposed to keep track of that during the dawn of mankind? Some sort of system for recording this information would have been helpful so people could rely less on memory and word of mouth, and more on a definite source of accurate information.

This is where writing comes in. According to Dr. Stephen Tinney, an associate professor of Assyriology at the University of Pennsylvania (that’s the study of ancient Mesopotamia, not butts), “The reason for inventing writing was the need to record the production and distribution of commodities like beer.” That’s hard to dispute: One of the oldest pieces of preserved writing is a clay tablet with a record of beer rations for workers.

1. The Creation of Civilization

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Early humans were nomadic, but these people couldn’t keep moving without abandoning their crops and therefore losing their sweet, sweet beer. It was time for a change. People had to stay put. They had to create more permanent shelter. These shelters were built closely to each other because that would make the cooperation involved in farming a lot easier. That kind of sounds like a town, doesn’t it?

These farming villages kicked off a period in history known as the agricultural revolution, or the Neolithic revolution. This ended hunter-gathering and led to the world’s first ever civilization: Mesopotamia, one of the first traces of organized society. Once people were moving less and leading more sustainable lives, they could spend less time worrying about being eaten and put thought into the challenges their new lifestyles presented. The concepts they came up with changed the world.

Math was supposedly invented so farmers knew where their land ended and the next guy’s began. The wheel may have been created to more easily transport goods like crops and beer. These and other ideas blossomed and snowballed into the world as we see it today. So thank you to beer for the pyramids, advertising, graphic design, medicine, farming, refrigeration, soda, writing, and everything else. We’ll deal with the hangovers, empty wallets, awkward social encounters and walks of shame; you just keep on tasting great.

Beer Helped Shape the World

– WIF Concocted History